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How do you deal with a capitalist parent? (hexbear.net)

submitted 3 weeks ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

NSFW 14 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Background: Last fall, I was hit by a car while walking and I fractured an endplate in my spine. I filed a lawsuit to be compensated for both damages and my pain and suffering. Turns out the car that hit me was uninsured, which means the pain and suffering portion would be on my car insurance (I live in a no-fault state and policies are expensive but it means your car insurance covers accidents even as a pedestrian). The insurance company is not paying, citing an arcane law that two family members cannot be on the same policy unless they live in the same house. My father and I live separately but bundle our cars to save money.

While this is a legal softball, I decided to not persue the punitive damages because the situation was so infuriating and my mental health was at stake. When I told this to my mother, she said "if you made more money, you could have had your own insurance policy and this wouldn't have happened."

I am considering total estrangement, as this comment was not only singularly offensive but is indicative of her draconian worldview, which is "got mine, fuck poor people."

Does anyone have a secret for how to deal with a parent this shitty? Should I even bother?

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm hoping there's more background to this than just that one comment. If that one comment is what is making you consider not talking to your mom anymore, I think that's a bit of an overreaction.

What your mom said is factually true. It seems that you found it insensitive, but it also seems like you're saying you want to cut your mom out of your life because she wishes you had a higher-paying job.

Saying you wish your kid had a higher-paying job isn't solely indicative to me that your mom is a greedy capitalist, moreso that she's recognizing that more money makes people's lives easier in our current mode of production. And also, just being a capitalist is a bit of a low bar for cutting out one of your parents.

I think maybe you should sit and think on this decision for a bit.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

You seem to have missed the bit where they were hit by a car and subjected to hostile legalism to deny them recovery, and the mother's response was "guess you should make more money". That is not "I wish you made more money because it would make this situation less terrible", it's "lmao, spin on it, poor".

Parents are not owed the attention, affection, nor respect of their children by the fact of birth. Humanity is a two-way street, and she took the off-ramp.

Will no mod rid us of this turbulent lib?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago

I think there's not enough context here for either of us to make an accurate read on the situation.

OP asked for advice on a subjective situation. I offered my interpretation.