this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2025
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Peppers and cucumbers are the traumatic forced abortions of the plant world. Broccoli and cauliflower are the amputated sex organs of the plants that were cut from their bodies. Celery, brussel sprouts, and artichokes are severed limbs of plants. This is a literal mass grave of dead and dying vegetation, an alter to the horrific mutilation and abuse perpetrated on an entire kingdom of life by humans. A final act of humiliation before we condemn them to the hell of cooking and consumption. I doubt the spray mist provides much comfort.
Fuck you vegetables, you little delicious motherfuckers. I will eat your dicks and corpses.
DOOM music intensifies
There is a religion called Jainism that actually tries to avoid harming even tiny organisms and plants. As such they avoid eating things like root vegetables that require the entire plant to be killed in order to harvest them.
Interestingly they are not necessarily against drinking milk, as milking an animal is viewed similarly to harvesting a fruit. Though its my understanding that they may still object to industrial milk production.
In traditional agriculture, you just feed, house and care for an animal, and when its young stops drinking milk, you keep milking the mother so it doesn't stop making milk.
I can't see any suffering in that.
Industrialized milk production is a complete perversion of that. It's what happens when you take a symbiotic relationship and add Capitalism.
You should hang out by the veggie tray at parties.
That's how I met my partner. We both love dips. We could talk or not talk about dips all day long and then do it again tomorrow.
That’s fucking metal
No, THIS is fucking metal!
Awesome! I'ma start a death metal band and put celery and brussel sprouts on the album covers.
Not metal, but here's some Vegetable Soul: https://youtube.com/watch?v=IKQjHwVc8b0
Guess I'll just eat rocks then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
They're minerals, Grostleton.
Oh sure. They’ve spend millions of years sedimenting to form or metamorphasizing in the warm molten bosom of Mother Earth, just so you can selfishly stuff your gob with their crunchy goodness. I hope you are happy with yourself.
Scientists have determined that rocks have souls. This revelation came on the heels of the discovery last month that souls definitely exist.
The only ethical move is to starve.
On a more serious note, plants communicate with each other through the plant version of pheromones, and some utilize an underground internet / postal service of sorts made of fungi mycelium called a mycelial network. They can even use this network to pass nutrients to plants that are in need.
More meat it is then. Save the vegetables!
I'm not vegetarian because I like animals. I'm vegetarian because I hate plants.