this post was submitted on 23 Apr 2025
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You asked "How do I react" and then when given a sympathetic and detailed answer seem to act as though it's a huge imposition being demanded of you.
The reality is that you don't have to do anything and no one has demanded you do anything. Sometimes, allyship requires effort. If you think you might be making someone uncomfortable and there is something you can do to ease that discomfort, it's your choice to make, but please don't act like it's women who are out there putting society in this position. It's men who are doing it. You're also may be "sorry" about it, but clearly not sorry enough to want to change to help.
Most women do not perceive every man as a threat. There are some that do I'm sure, but generally there's a specific set of circumstances where it becomes an issue. If you don't want to take those opportunities to exercise allyship by making them more comfortable, you don't have to.