this post was submitted on 23 Apr 2025
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The only vaguely concerning bit I see here is the penultimate sentence. Evading consent is sketchy, but I'm not a behavioral psychologist and thus have no working knowledge on how that would impact his "treatment".
I think that's what stuck for me. Manipulation takes many forms, not all look evil. She should take these observations and talk to him about it, instead of using them as tools to treat his feelings.
Talk about what, though?
"Hello, I would like to give you peanuts sometimes when you're sad. Do you accept these terms?"
What is he consenting to that he's not already aware of?
Speaking of pavlovian conditioning, the reason I don't like casinos, loot boxes in video games, gacha mechanics, etc., is not that I think those people haven't consented to their money being taken from them. I just don't think those are good institutions. Or practices. Whichever word applies. They take more than they give, and I don't think that's fair.
You're grossly misrepresenting what this is. She got desserts and noted him as food motivated. That's insulting. He only got happy because there was food for him to eat, really? No discussion of why he was sad before, just get him snacks and move on? Maybe talk to him and ask why he seemed upset before desert instead of just giving him a snack and hoping it's better.
The woman here is trying to change his mood or behavior through dog training techniques instead of figuring out why he feels or acts a certain way. Is he aware that she is literally treating him like a dog? It comes across as her caring about his behavior in the moment more than his overall mental health.
I don't know about you, but I love dessert.
So, 1, this doesn't answer my question about what it is he hasn't consented to.
2, how is it you know she's not interested in his life story?
Fair, but if I'm upset because I might lose my job or my mom is sick then that doesn't address any of those.
Ok let's answer that. Did she say "I'm going to treat you like a dog" and him agree? Did she say, "I'm giving you an m&m ever time you open up to encourage it" I doubt it and she never mentioned it. She simply does this as a manipulation technique without ever discussing "hey, I think we need to talk about you being comfortable being vulnerable."
Well she had the chance to say she actually talked about and addressed the problems upsetting him, but she never mentioned that at all. Just dog training strategies she uses on him without him being aware.
And what does this mean, exactly? You get the extra muffin she baked or something? You get to cuddle a lot?
She probably didn't say that, no, but I assume he can see this, like, with his eyes. If he doesn't want m&m's, why take them?
So, she hasn't told you via this tweet, therefore, ergo, concordantly, vice ve, she has never cared or asked about, like, his childhood or his mom.