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Is there even porn on Lemmy? Asking for a friend
Barely any, sadly. We need more gals (and guys, too) to bare themselves here so it won't be bare-ly anymore. Bears are acceptable, too. Not just twinks.
Search Lemmy NSFW online, it's there, just disconnected? I still don't understand the different "nodes".
The word you are looking for there is "instance", like for you lemm.ee is your instance.
And if you scroll to the bottom of any page, you can see the instances list of all the other ones that are connected or disconnected (the latter called more often "defederated") from yours. lemm.ee is connected to https://lemmynsfw.com/, although it looks like something is wrong with the connection between it and feddit.org (e.g. it's not reporting even the Lemmy software version for it, plus the encoding for the name looks different than on Lemm.ee - someone may have typed it in wrong?), so @[email protected] you'll have to contact your instance admins to tell them about that.
Even then, to connect to the communities for the first time is quite a process: you can figure out what the URL is going to be, then try to go there, then request to join, then wait maybe a day and the content should show up (but only new content form then onwards, while old stuff is a lost cause at that point). Most of the time someone else (with more experience) has already done this for you, but if they have not...
Btw PieFed solves all of these issues (except it might not allow porn? I'm not sure but I don't see it anywhere there), whereas Lemmy is quite a bit behind in its software experience that it offers. The entire Fediverse though is more for the '"early adopter" mindset than like Reddit, where everything "just works" (so long as what you want is in alignment with increasing their profits). Using Lemmy is a LOT like using Linux - except here there's basically no documentation that someone is pointed to, you kinda just have to ask or read and find stuff out as you go.