this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2025
854 points (98.5% liked)

196

1621 readers
2572 users here now

Community Rules

You must post before you leave

Be nice. Assume others have good intent (within reason).

Block or ignore posts, comments, and users that irritate you in some way rather than engaging. Report if they are actually breaking community rules.

Use content warnings and/or mark as NSFW when appropriate. Most posts with content warnings likely need to be marked NSFW.

Most 196 posts are memes, shitposts, cute images, or even just recent things that happened, etc. There is no real theme, but try to avoid posts that are very inflammatory, offensive, very low quality, or very "off topic".

Bigotry is not allowed, this includes (but is not limited to): Homophobia, Transphobia, Racism, Sexism, Abelism, Classism, or discrimination based on things like Ethnicity, Nationality, Language, or Religion.

Avoid shilling for corporations, posting advertisements, or promoting exploitation of workers.

Proselytization, support, or defense of authoritarianism is not welcome. This includes but is not limited to: imperialism, nationalism, genocide denial, ethnic or racial supremacy, fascism, Nazism, Marxism-Leninism, Maoism, etc.

Avoid AI generated content.

Avoid misinformation.

Avoid incomprehensible posts.

No threats or personal attacks.

No spam.

founded 5 days ago
MODERATORS
 

I sometimes think about how other people have less happy relationships than mine, and that makes me sad for them

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 29 points 5 days ago (3 children)

Glad it's worked well for the original OP.

I still remember reading in the book "Thinking Fast and Slow" and the research they presented on happiness. Apparently their data averaged out to: 1. baseline happiness when single, 2. big spike up in the first year of marriage, 3. Settles at a permanent level below the baseline (from when single).

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Does that book mention that married women die earlier?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Which is patently untrue, on average married women live about 2 years longer than unmarried women

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago

Well, that depends of which study you look at

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago

I have not read the book, but from reading some summaries and commentaries, I got the impression that other people took the message as being different from "marriage makes your life measurably less happy" as the chart implied.

The figure takes on a different meaning, however, when we remember that “How satisfied are you with your life?” is not a simple question. When answering it, people think of significant events in the recent past or near future. People who are recently married or expecting to marry are likely to retrieve that fact, which affects their answer. But those who are not do not think of marriage when answering. The graph could be read as the likelihood that people will think of their marriage when asked about their lives. This demonstrates once again how we are “blind to our blindness”—how we are unaware of the heuristic mistakes that we make. In evaluating this graph, people do not understand that respondents have substituted their answer to how satisfied they are with their life with how easily they can think of happy events in their lives.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 5 days ago (2 children)

The main problem is that making a happy marriage stay happy takes a lot of daily work. Thankfully my parents showed me how to do that, and more importantly my dad showed me how to make it fun.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago

A lot of couples stop dating after they get married, it seems they just want to go through a checklist

[–] [email protected] 20 points 5 days ago

Your dad sounds wise. Knowledge like that still isn't widespread, and back then even less so. There are no role models teaching/showing/demonstrating this in real life or in media that I have come across.