this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] [email protected] 139 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

She died in battle, so discount Valhalla?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

I don’t think you get into Valhalla with a folding knife. She’s probably in the Dick’s Sporting Goods in the sky.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

The Medium Place.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

She will always have her posthumous Darwin award though

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

posthumous Darwin award

Is there another kind?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

Since the award is for removing your ability to spread your genes, any self-inflicted stupid act that resulted in, eg castration, should be considered eligible.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Darwin Awards

An "award" given to people who contribute the most to the evolution of humanity by removing their genes from the gene pool. Sometimes given to people who simply sterilize themselves, but most of the recipients have ended up dead because of their actions.

Basically, the concept is that people kill/injure themselves to the point where reproduction is no longer possible whilst doing something surrealistically stupid. By insuring that their stupid genes do not spread, they ultimately help humanity and thus recieve an award.

While the concept is funny enough, the actual awards are usually very mean spirited.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Yep. All people need to do is remove themselves from the gene pool. Often that involves removing themselves from the count of the living, but some just sterilize themselves in some stupid way.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yes, but it's almost exclusively awarded to men.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I thought a Darwin award meant specifically that the recipient died. So I'm not getting this, if it's a joke or otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

I think you can get it if you remove yourself from the gene pool. I think there were awards for men who accidentally castrated themselves before having children.

[–] [email protected] 90 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

That was also implied.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

Heaven is a place where nothing ever happens.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I was told that ooh heaven is a place on Earth.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Do you know what that's worth??

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

They say, in heaven, "butt plug Smurf."

Lots of people are saying it. Good people, smart people.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Instructions unclear. Now have many Smurfs in butt, wat do

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

the most messed up thing is I read that line and instead of thinking of the oldschool kids' prayer i start hearing Metallica playing in my head.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

At least in heaven I can skate.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

'Cause right now on earth I can't do jack

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Without the man upon my back.