chapotraphouse

I think you're making a very dangerous conflation here. Yes, there are lazy assholes on the board who like punching down at miserable mentally ill people because ultimately the board is full of shitty people to only a slightly lesser degree than most places, and they fucking love being given permission to designate someone as subhuman if that designated subhuman doesn't have a visible identity they can whip out to say they're one of the good guys because they're also socially minoritized. This leads to attacking a lot of mentally ill people, but woke.

However

"Incel" does not mean miserable loner with mental illness. There are a lot of miserable loners with mental illness who are not incels, and I know that because I'm one of them and have spent many years as one, but I've never called myself an "incel," I don't spend my time on internet boards with nazis ranting about why women should be slaves, as I said before, there's a difference between having a rough time with being mentally ill and unloved and making a political project of hating women and seeking their terror and subjugation.

While it is totally within your capability to stop making this conflation, I don't think it started with you nearly as much as it started with people masking their antisocial attitude towards, uh, let's call them sad virgins by rightfully coaching it in terms of criticism of the politically heinous project of incels, the way that some "socialists" love going "white women be like" because they want to say "women be like." They just phrase it differently to make their disgusting attitudes palatable to certain other self-styled progressives. My guess (I apologize for using italics to much here) is that you at least intuited this pattern of behavior but just drew a poor conclusion from it by letting those "fake woke" assholes convince you that you and incels have common cause when that could not be farther from the truth.

[In reference to some of your other comments] I've known guys like you who let the not getting laid thing develop into an obsession and have had such an obsession myself a long time ago. I can't really help you with that, I couldn't help the other guys and I myself only really understood how ridiculous that attitude is after I spent some time in a relationship, so I didn't really need to outgrow it. I'm lonely again now and have been for years, but my experience tells me that fucking wouldn't somehow make me whole and it's not worth obsessing over. I can't transmit that to you, so basically there's just the drop in the bucket as my anecdotal evidence.

I think very few people on this board are going to engage with you constructively on this, so if their being gross is intolerable to you, it's probably not good to keep complaining to them because you're just an other to them. Some people can engage on this and I see one or two have though (e.g. the person who explained the significance of the fact that most people don't like ER).

Edit: I should say that there's also a lot of rightful incel-bashing that doesn't make the conflation that I mentioned, it's just that it can be misconstrued that way if you have already bought into "incel" being a codeword for "miserable loner with mental illness".