this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2025
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The same thing was said around corporal punishment in the past. We have learned that there are more effective, less damaging methods of teaching than yelling, and isolation. I have two kids, I have used physical force when they were too young to understand words (smack on the bottom while in diapers etc). I have raised my voice, I have grounded them from electronics etc. I am doing the best I can with the information I have at my disposal. When they ask questions, they get answers.
At any time I know my children could report me or my spouse to government agents, who would come investigate, review and if I was in the wrong, I would be corrected. But if I was not in the wrong, life would continue. The stigma that comes along with it? Thats the cost of having children really.
If the pre-teens you are dealing with dont understand what abuse is, that sounds like an opportunity for education, not justification.