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How do you deal with the situation where you are invited to play a game, only to find it's wildly complex and takes 4 hours to finish, and you find yourself not wanting to play it within minute 5? (lemm.ee)

submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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This has happened to me a few times. One I remember was the game Alchemist, where I just sat there confused as hell for 4 and a half hours while three guys were all talking about strategies. Tonight it was Terraforming Mars, where I was told it would be a 3 hour game, but by hour 4 we were halfway done. This time I said "it's 11pm, I have work in the morning, this will be my last hand" and the host got very passive aggressive with me. I just don't know what to do in these situations.

^Also is there a word for this? My girlfriend said I was "held game hostage" but I don't see that used in my searches.^

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Open and honest communication. Just say that you're not interested in the game.

If the host gets passive-aggressive you could try to talk civilised about that. In case they don't show the necessary understanding or are difficult to talk to, they might be not be the kind of acquaintance you would like to keep.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 7 months ago (1 children)

To clarify, say that BEFORE starting the game. If we're 3 hours into a 4 hour game and you bail because you're not interested, depending on how it affects the game lots of people would get pretty pissy.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 7 months ago

Had the exact opposite happen once — playing Risk with a group of friends, one guy ends up completely dominating the board. Almost everyone is out, just him and one other person left.

Everyone wants to either start a new game or go to a pub, but he still hasn't won. We ask him several times if he's accomplished his goal yet; he hasn't.

He drags the game out by an additional 3 hours, and finally wins. Turns out he had won some 4 hours earlier, and "forgot" or "misunderstood" his objective. In reality, assholes just wanted to try to take over the whole world, and thought we wouldn't insist on seeing the objective card afterwards.

We banned him from participating in any and all games. For life. This was some 25 years ago. I haven't seen him for 10+ years, but to the best of my knowledge, nobody from that particular friend group (around 12 people) ever let him participate in any games again.