this post was submitted on 15 Nov 2024
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And Finally...

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A bank robber put a pillow case over his head to hide his identity - then had to take it off as he could not see.

Matthew Davies failed to create eye holes in the cover ahead of the armed raid at a bank in Dunfermline, Fife last September.

The 47-year-old, who threatened staff with a meat cleaver, left the branch with nearly £2,000 but was later arrested.

...

A hearing at the High Court in Glasgow heard how Davies entered the Bank of Scotland branch and pulled the meat cleaver from the pillow case before putting the bedding item on to cover his face.

But the failure to create eye holes meant he had to take it off.

...

The court heard how a witness then followed Davies from the branch to his Dunfermline home.

Police later found the cash and a pillow case "consistent with what he put over his head" at his house.

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 hours ago

Oceans 0.11

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 hours ago

Reminds me of one of the teenage scrotes from where I grew up who somehow managed to nick a chequebook.

The kid went into an audio/video specialist in town and wrote a cheque for a high end TV. This was back when TVs were all using cathode-ray tubes and were bloody heavy. The guy in the shop offered to deliver it. So our plucky hero gave him his name and address.

The police were waiting for him by the time he got home.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 11 hours ago)

I’m Ants In My Eyes Johnson, here at Ants In My Eyes Johnson’s Electronics! I mean there’s so many ants in my eyes and there’s so many TVs, microwaves, radios…I think, I can’t…I’m not 100% sure what we’re have here in stock because I can’t see anything! Our prices, I hope, aren’t too low!!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 hours ago