Asklemmy

Given:

You lack the capacity to experience imposter syndrome.

In early 1980s, driving to the mall right before Christmas with girlfriend and her mom in their ancient huge Caddilac. It's a zoo. Girlfriend's mom consipates the whole parking garage by driving poorly and gridlocking the place. People are honking and yelling at her. She hangs out the window and yells, in a strong Fran Drescher accent: "YOU DON'T HAVE THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT!"

“He always was a bit of a… reader when he was young.” said with such utter contempt and disgust; like it was a terrible thing.

Not me but: “I was showing the new system to anons father. Have more luck teaching a rock how to float.”

"YOU DRIVE VERY FAST". Screamed at me out her minivan window by a middle aged Indian woman making a left across traffic in front of me. Still cracks me up.

I called out man in his fifties being sleezy around women who didn't have any company.

I roasted him , to which he responded "you are bad" (in my native language that word would specifically mean bad at something).

Bad at WHAT bro?

"Go lick a dead camel jackass!"

Shouted by a friend at a high school bully from a moving car. 😂

I have heard having autism being used as an insult

The strange part is that, even though i have autism and the person saying that insult knows that i have, i have never been called that, even avoiding to tell other people if asked

McDonald head. A little girl, maybe 4, called me McDonald head while laughing hysterically and pointing, for like 10 min straight. This was more than 20 years ago and I can still hear her laughter.

I used to be over 350 lbs. with long, thin, greasy hair and a very pale complexion. My nose isn't long, but it's a bit pointy. Probably had dark eye sockets if I'm being honest about my health at the time. Anyway, my friend's brother stood in front of me when we were sitting around drunk, and said "No offense, but you look like the Penguin (from Batman) right now." Then went on to try to make that sound less offensive by suggesting it was just the lighting or the angle or something. But I knew what he was talking about. He was absolutely right. I never felt worse about myself.

Thankfully I lost all that weight over a decade ago. Shaved my head, got healthier, grew a beard, and had what my wife calls a tremendous glow-up. But I used to be the Penguin... So you should watch out.

"You look like a lifeguard" made my friend spit his drink out with that one

"You're too hard to hug."

I'm a muscular dude. This was a complaint from a woman I knew. It was not a compliment, she genuinely refused to hug me when we greeted each other.

"You look like Ramsey Bolton"

"You're not good for much, but you do a damn good vacuum."

-60yo lady to 20yo me, bookshop job.

"You know enough to be dangerous"

It can be used as either an insult or a compliment.

That I'm a gay n word. Like, I am neither so what's up with that? He quickly biked off and I couldn't get him to clarify.

A random little kid at the park called me “gummy face”, and I definitely did not cry about later that night.