this post was submitted on 26 Oct 2024
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Greentext

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 days ago

Pottery class. You are a dirty mess, every one is a dirty mess and y'all have something in common. Plus it is an artistic expression and as long as you are willing to talk about artistic struggles being "bad" isn't detriment at all. And worst comes to show you now have a new coffee cup.

Replace Pottery with whatever is offered locally.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

You have to leverage the situation you're in, but something that works well for me is go climbing gym > compliment someone on their climb > strike conversation > if it goes well, ask for their insta (semi-public info) > slip into DMs (wanna go climbing again?) > make a move

Between each >, it's obviously only a step you can do if the vibes check, but it's one example of something that works. Also I won't lie doing this is a bit difficult, but you get better with practice. It also works great if you go to busy climbing gyms in different places at different times, since you'll always see new people. Final caveat is I do this for friends, since I'm already dating, but it works the same way to catch a bf/gf

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

I legit have no idea how I meet people but some how I have friends and occasionally girlfriends. I can't control when it happens I just have to wait until I get a friend join event.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago

Find pubs with karaoke, and do it. If you're decent, someone will compliment you. Strike up a conversation with them.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Dating is a complete shit show. People that say to just work on your self are only telling half the story. Of course it's important to be open and actively willing to improve, but it's equally as important to identify the kind of people in your life. Legit, the only reason I'm not a complete fucking incel today is because I was lucky enough to have a friend to connected me with someone I wouldn't have ever met otherwise.

I was convinced that all my self-improvement was pointless as I kept getting shoved away as a monster for simply being a man and getting cucked by literal rapists. Felt like what I believed in must have been fundamentally flawed somehow, that I was just broken. Turns out I was just used to attracting shit people.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 days ago

This is the key that too many straight men who use words like "friend zone" and "game" and "incel" just don't realise.. don't go hunting for a bride like some caveman. Go make friends. Live your life by doing the things you like, treat women like women not like a prize to be won. Make male and female friends, don't just talk to women who you're attracted to. Find friends, and not with the anticipation that one of them will turn into a girlfriend. "Friend zoned" is what people say when they don't get that they're not owed a relationship, and think that being friends with women is a waste of time. Find friends. Be who you are, be genuine. That's the only way you'll find people who are genuinely interested in spending time with you and not some persona you've adopted. If you want an actual good match of a partner, it's more likely that a friend of yours will match you up with someone than you finding the one by going out like you're on the hunt.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago

dating apps are bleak as fuck, yes.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 3 days ago

If you are a man, do not go to bars or clubs alone and expect anything unless you are like, insanely hot or charming. But if you are either of those things you don't need my advice. Either go with friends or do something more actively social, like a class or outright social group.

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