this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2024
781 points (97.1% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

This is really cute, but the first thing you should've said to her is the cheesy pick up line from the day you met her.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"So, as I was trying to say..."

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Come here often?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

I love wholesome greentexts

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (1 children)

NO, IM FINE. ITS ALLERGIES.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

WHO'S CUTTING ONIONS IN THE HOSPITAL?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

"just a little better" probably an understatement

[–] [email protected] 112 points 1 month ago (5 children)

So it’s fake because 4chan. But also it’s fake because even if you’re late deafened you need to learn how to hear after getting cochlear implants.

Also because it’s rare for adults fluent in sign language with a supportive network to choose CIs unless late deafened

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

How do you know he was a confidential informant?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

She would have had to learn to hear, learn to speak. Perhaps she couldn't understand them, perhaps all the meaning communicated was in sign language

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Also "she gave me her number." And? Did you call her?

(I guess I'm dating myself here because texting is a thing, but...)

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I’m 30 and can’t imagine calling someone in response to being given a number. My entire life my number has been for texting

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

the real question is if it's also gay too.

dont ask me i don't use four chan.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

what if they're both fat

[–] [email protected] 70 points 1 month ago (4 children)

This is fake, but not gay.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

Oh this is the gayest green text I've seen in long time /s

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Happy Cakeday! 🍰🎂

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Did Anon specify their gender?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

No, I assumed it for a stupid joke.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

CAN I BE OFFENDED ON ANON'S BEHALF PLEASE

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Of course you can! This is Lemmy! Being offended for other people is half the posts.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Turns out anon is a female

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Don't be silly, there are no women on the internet.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

We've already established the fake

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

Oh yeah, good point. Didn't think of that. My apologies.

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