this post was submitted on 08 Sep 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

I always suspected my children were chaotic evil. The bread was not the first indicator.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

My cat learned to open the bread box and then chews a hole in the bag...

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Here's a version for my fellow gluten-free peeps:

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Funniest comment so far, you get a prize! An upvote.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

Thank you! I want to ::sniff:: thank my coach, the whole team ::sniff::, and especially my mom for helping make this happen! ::sniff:: Love you mom!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

10th option: eat the entire loaf in one sitting.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

I was thinking that this matrix is missing an accompanying time-chart but I don't know how to plot the y axis.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

LG, back when I bought sliced bread, except for when the container was getting its occasional wash. In those cases CN or, more rarely, NE.

I switched to making better bread at home that could just chill on the counter as-is (cut side down) for days without issue. Then we figured out that part of my stomach issues are due to gluten (awaiting endoscopy for confirmation, but probably celiac based on an old DNA test that said I was likely, my dad officially getting it, and a host of symptoms that mostly went away when doing low-/no-carb diets).

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Hair tie. I always have 1, or 2, or 3 in my pocket.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

None of this shit. Homemade uncooked unrisen or partially risen loaves in the freezer, cooked ones in cloth bread bags. If you don't suck ass at making bread it will always be eaten before it goes stale but its still toastable or usable for cooking. Or just adjust loaf size to match consumption rate. In my region anything in plastic will go moldy before you get halfway, especially purchased loaves.

bonus: secret ingredient for general purpose slicing loaf. 6 to 10 tbsp of chestnut honey. The honey itself smells kinda iffy and tastes aeird but baking it in bread gives it this amazing aroma. Toasting brings out the aroma again after it cools. Great for real bread ice cream sandwiches, especially toasted if you do it as a bowl.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Chaotic neutral and the bread goes in the freezer

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

I belong to true neutral. Go rubberband gang.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

My bread is in the fridge, for I am pod person.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Chaotic neutral for me. The twist tie goes in my twist tie collection.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

idk why anyone would choose anything but chaotic neutral

unless you own a breadbox

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Exactly! Everything else is just extra steps for the same result.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I bounce between lawful neutral and chaotic neutral. Huh.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Yeah, largely depends on whether I've lost the clip in the 30s I had the bag open

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Chaotic neutral is the one true answer because it requires no secondary sealing device (clip, twist tie, rubber band, etc). It also allows you to open the bag with one hand.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I'm lawful neutral until the clip breaks, which it always does, and then I go chaotic neutral.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Y'all don't just throw the bag in the refrigerator?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

I had to switch to using a bread box because my dog would eat anything on the counter, and I didn't really have anywhere else to store my bread/bagels without really rearranging my limited cabinet space.

That dog was ravenous. She even ate a whole crab once, shell and all. I learned my lesson.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Where's the "four slices per freezer bag and keep in the freezer" option? Or am I just too good for this chart?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Omg how much plastic do you go through?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

When I buy frozen meat (maybe once every couple months) I unpackage, then repackage them into unfreezable portions with small plastic lunch bags/saran.

If someone has a better way please let me know. I don't have infinite tupperware drawer space though.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

I imagine you could reuse those.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I thought that said twist and fuck

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

Come on, come on, come on now baby...

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I tie a slip knot. That is stupidly easy to do/undo, but apparently I am hated for it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Slipknots are ok but I think you may as well do a mean twist and tuck unless the bread is travelling. The knot can go bad* if you share bread with others.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Not sure I understand what you are saying. I do a real big twist and then a slip knot. The twist doesn't come undone. I am out of bread or I would take a picture.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Chaotic Neutral

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Twist & Tuck gang

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

I was in the "tie a knot" camp for YEARS. Laziness just moved me into reusing the ~~bread~~ bag clip.

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