Unpopular Opinion
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How is this not the mental health version of racism?
OP walks by black homeless person. "They might be black, but they are using their race as an excuse to be lazy. They are only getting in their own way"
OP walks by a disheveled person with ADHD. "They might have ADHD, but they are using it as an excuse to be a mess. They are only getting in their own way"
You are being judgemental, if not prejudicial AF.
If a homeless person claims the color of their skin is the sole reason they're homeless then they're absolutely using it as an excuse.
The system of oppression POC face isn't to blame at all, huh? 🙄
'Just pull yerself up by yer own bootstraps, lad!
While I do agree (or at least hope) that we all have the agency to positively influence our own lives and those around us, the main point there in my opinion is that different people have different resources in life. Someone that's experienced systemic racism, or someone who's brain is a wee bit non-standard just has it harder than someone not experiencing these issues.
I never claimed some people don't have it harder than others. It's a spectrum and a large number of people are not in the far end of it. Those are the people I'm talking about. Would it be easier if they didn't have this condition? Ofcourse it would. That however still doesn't mean that personal agency doesn't have a role in it. There are several reasons for why people struggle with getting things done and in the vast majority of cases having ADHD is just one of the contributing factors. It's an explanation, not an excuse.
Yea, fair
The people who don't even understand ADHD at all are, anyways.
Like really, this post does shed a lot of truth but not 100%. The reason Depression, ADHD, Bipolar .etc seem so stupidly common now is because there's way too many people self-diagnosing themselves. Yeah I get it, therapy costs, but it doesn't do you any good to just google symptoms and be all like "OMG I HAVE ALL OF THESE THINGS!" and go by that.
A lot of the time, these issues do stress that you need to be medically diagnosed for it to be official. I've gone through therapy twice, currently in it now, I can verify that I do indeed have these issues.
And it pisses me the fuck off to see these fakers run around, blowing anything out of proportions and then going "Ah, it must be my ADHD acting out again - wait, I saw squirrels!". ANYONE who does the whole overdone squirrels joke automatically to me, while claiming to have ADHD, means you don't have shit.
These people use mental illnesses as excuses to behave the way they do and brandish it in anyway to get out of responsibility. Like every asshole I've watched in police bodycam videos, they'll scream how they have 100 things wrong with them and they've gotten thrown to the ground because they simply didn't follow orders and it's a fucking traffic violation that they escalated.
They'll never ever admit to how much of a bullshitter these fakers are because that would mean ousting themselves for being who they really are.
All the ADHD memes are too easy to relate to for a non ADHD person so now everyone either thinks they have it or thinks it isn't real.
That's another issue is the memes, also probably come from people who likely don't have it.
My point wasn't that they're faking it. What I'm saying is that a large number of people with an actual diagnosis are still treating it as an excuse. It's an explanation for why things are as they are. It's not a permission to throw in the towel and stop trying to do the best they can do. It's a very small number of people with ADHD that actually have so severe case of it that they genuinely can't even take care of themselves.
Peer support is important but that's not what I'm often reading in the comments of these ADHD memes I see posted here. It's people telling other people that it's out of their control because that's what they're telling themselves too. ADHD might make things more difficult to them but the main reason they're not getting anything done is not ADHD but cynicism and lack of self-discipline.
OP have you considered that the state you're seeing them in is them trying their best?
Best isn't static right, like when I run some sometimes my best is wheezing and throwing up through 5 km in 50 minutes because I'm hungover and sleep deprived, sometimes it's getting shoes on and stepping outside before deciding to quit, and sometimes it's nailing a pb on a 15 km run and only cutting it short because I have responsibilities and shit.
You just don't know what's going on in someone's life. I am diagnoses adhd and have been undergoing treatment for 15 years. Mostly I seem like a kinda lazy spinster with too many hobbies and an untidy yard; sometimes I'm a whirl of activity and achievement; and other times I spend 3 weeks paralysed on the couch, absolutely wracked with guilt and self loathing, pleading for my brain to just give me enough of anything to feed myself for the first time in 3 days while my head pounds from dehydration and I want to peal my skin off for how dirty and uncomfortable it is.
Every moment is me trying my best. I can't imagine not extending the courtesy of that belief to everyone else.
Not everyone is trying their best. People without ADHD have varying levels of self-discipline. So do people with it. This isn't some kind of blanket critizism towards everyone with ADHD.
What do you think self discipline is? Like what does it mean for someone to have more or less of it? How could you tell?
I ask because to me it's executive function. which had a physiological basis and varies based on physiological state. So someone without a well functioning executive function system's best would look kinda arse to someone who had a functional one.
Lack of self-discipline is not doing what you know needs to be done and giving yourself excuses as to why this isn't your fault but solely due to external reasons. It's not taking personal responsibility and instead blaming the world for your issues. I can never afford a home because of capitalism. I can't work out because of bad knees. I can't get a girlfriend because I'm ugly.
If a person with no job or friends spends all their time inside smoking weed, playing video games, jerking off and then justifying this complete lack of function by telling themselves a story about how their mind is broken and there's nothing they can do about it then I'd claim that more often than not there other reasons for that than just them having ADHD. I know because I'm that person.
At no point have I said ADHD doesn't play a role in it but it's always a combination of several factors of which some they have more control over than others.
"My point wasn't that they're faking it. What I'm saying is that a large number of people with an actual diagnosis are still treating it as an excuse."
Annnnnd that's when I stopped reading. Next time you make a post, kind of think it through? Because honestly that sounds like baiting.
I don't think most people enjoy feeling like a burden, judged as lazy, or living in filth and failing to achieve their goals.
Usually for someone to smoke weed all day and play video games or w/e without maintaining hygiene and health something has to be seriously wrong. Animals not maintaining themselves is like the biggest warning sign that something is wrong.
To simplify that as 'So and so lacks self discipline' is moronic. Maybe they claim they have adhd and they don't but something is fucking wrong with a brain in that state and they need help.
ADHD is overdiagnosed, but I don't think laziness or a lack of self-discipline have anything to do with it.
This is to say that while ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, in our very stimulus rich world today a lot of people have disorders reminiscent of ADHD due to an excess of stimuli compared to the level their brain is capable of processing.
That's to say our world has gotten too fast for a lot of brains to keep up with, and when those brains compensate, they get symptoms similar to ADHD, despite those symptoms not being neurodevelopmental, per se. So similar meds help with the condition.
And that's fine.
Still, ADHD is way overdiagnosed. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4500182/
And to anyone saying they're not, I would like to point to the people who were vehement that opioids weren't being overprescribed.
I mean, yeah it's an unpopular opinion. That's because it's utter bullshit, and a good bit douchey tbh.
You confuse self discipline with executive function. Most people with ADHD have plenty of self discipline, it just isn't always enough to overcome a neurological difference.
Self discipline is about building habits, and setting up tools to assist in executive function. That is where the self discipline comes in to adhd, and there's a shit ton of success at it.
Nevermind what I said in my post. This comment is a better TLDR (if a bit blunt)
I'll toss in my 2cents. There are a few informed replies I think OP should go back and reread. I agree with OP that most of the comments are skewing AWAY from the actual topic. And, yes of course lazy dimwits are using the latest convenient terms to get out of doing whatever they ought to be doing.
Lazy will do what lazy can which I can personally corroborate. I know someone with severe ADHD who functions perfectly well in society, at home, and at work; they need patience, self-awareness, therapy, and a lot of medication that would melt my brain but let's them functional adequately. There are also periods where their house is a wreck because they can't get it together to clean up for a few days.
I know someone who celebrates when they "finally" get a diagnosis they know they've had for years but doctors "are so ignorant". This person just wants to smoke weed all day and watch D&D let's plays on YT; it's my niece btw, and they have issues-ADHD is not one of them.
My filter works like this: people with a genuine hidden disability will inform you instead of using it as an excuse for why something didn't get done. "I know I have been dropping the ball on kitchen duties. Could we swap household duties? Maybe I am more consistent with bathroom cleaning than the kitchen. And I will talk to my doctor about this at our next visit" OR "I have really bad ADHD. That's why we don't have any clean dishes and the kitchen stinks. But I will get right on it."