How to lose my respect on day one.
this post was submitted on 28 May 2024
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Are your respect based on the ability to contain flatulence? You do you, I just hope that any lactose intolerant people around you stay away from that sweet lactose :P
That's totally something Michael Scott would say.
And in true Michael Scott fashion, below the veneer of inappropriate immaturity, there is nascent wisdom.
But then he accidentally shits himself trying to fart and you forget all about that.
Is someone still running the cloud to farts plugin from the early 2010s?
I remember it as cloud-to-butt
Somebody may have been huffing their own farts a bit too much.
I fart in my bossโs general direction.
Can you please just use the word Vulnerability instead?
How much you wanna bet the author of that post also has a fetish for farts?
This is why I fart constantly whenever I'm in the office. Not only am I asserting dominance, but I'm setting an example for the junior engineers.
Broke: not farting in the office
Woke: farting in the office
Bespoke: sharting in the office
#3 is why I keep a backup outfit stashed under my desk.
Fart for the position you want, not the position you have.
I was expecting the twist to be that fart was an acronym. Like:
Fess up
Admit mistakes
Reassess direction
Time-bound
A good leader is willing to have a F.A.R.T. discussion.
Fess up
I shat my pants
Admit mistakes
I thought it would just be a fart
Reassess direction
I should probably not go to that meeting right now
Time-bound
I have 90 seconds until that shart starts to leek out of my pants
Them who S.M.E.L.T it D.E.A.L.T. it!
This is actually a pretty good post
Right it's still reeking of the usual LinkedIn vibe ("my infinite wisdom will change your life!") but at least it's factual stuff and humorous.
I have noise cancelling headphones and am used to working mostly at home. Sometimes I wonder if I've ever accidentally ripped a doozy in my cube without realizing it.
I accidentally hit my vape when we experimented with BTO at my last employer. Luckily, I was the first one in and the back door was nearby, so I just rushed outside to exhale. Vaping at home while working had become my norm.
I mean I kind of get the metaphor and appreciate the idea of being the kind of leader that people can feel comfortable around, but there's got to be better ways of expressing that.
Depends on how you define "better".
More polite? Sure. More relatable to a wider audience? Honestly, probably not. Everyone farts. And those who don't are dirty dirty liars.
everyone farts? not anymore!
MEND BUTTCHEEKS
Would you have read it all the way through otherwise? I wouldnโt have.
Farting is a metaphor for when you actually fart.