this post was submitted on 27 May 2025
2 points (100.0% liked)

Men's Liberation

2169 readers
1 users here now

This community is first and foremost a feminist community for men and masc people, but it is also a place to talk about men’s issues with a particular focus on intersectionality.


Rules

Everybody is welcome, but this is primarily a space for men and masc people


Non-masculine perspectives are incredibly important in making sure that the lived experiences of others are present in discussions on masculinity, but please remember that this is a space to discuss issues pertaining to men and masc individuals. Be kind, open-minded, and take care that you aren't talking over men expressing their own lived experiences.



Be productive


Be proactive in forming a productive discussion. Constructive criticism of our community is fine, but if you mainly criticize feminism or other people's efforts to solve gender issues, your post/comment will be removed.

Keep the following guidelines in mind when posting:

  • Build upon the OP
  • Discuss concepts rather than semantics
  • No low effort comments
  • No personal attacks


Assume good faith


Do not call other submitters' personal experiences into question.



No bigotry


Slurs, hate speech, and negative stereotyping towards marginalized groups will not be tolerated.



No brigading


Do not participate if you have been linked to this discussion from elsewhere. Similarly, links to elsewhere on the threadiverse must promote constructive discussion of men’s issues.



Recommended Reading

Related Communities

[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]


founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
 

I'm getting really sick of leftist social media like Bluesky just being about being another echo chamber and completely unaware of it because "we're the good politics!"

The sentiment that men are only men if they're associated with the right has been out in full swing for a few years now and it's just tiring.

Harris didn't win because men will never accept a woman president. Except all the men who voted for her, they don't count, the left gets told it has a problem with men all the time and deflects by saying that it's men who have the problem by going to the right and supporting them.

Never, not once, are men acknowledged for supporting leftist beliefs or voting for the party, and it's even looked down upon when they ask for acknowledgement, like it's entitlement while men on the right live rent free in the heads of the leftist base.

Men get shit on for being asked to be recognized as men on the left but that identity is freely given to men on the right, they don't have to ask to be acknowledged or recognized because they're doing what is expected by being the bad guys.

Straight men in particular, you'll be recognized as a man on the left if you're gay because it assures everyone who isn't a man you don't want anything from them.

Like for fuck's sake the right is abhorrent and shames women and LBGTQ people for their existence I don't know how the left got to this point of also saying "you're not really a man unless you hate women" and not realizing they're perpetuating the same bullshit.

Like I don't hate women for being women, but I fucking hate when people assert "all men just hate women" because it's dumb shit gender essentialism that is just dismissing anything a guy might say in response that isn't telling the speaker to go fuck themselves.

Yeah of course the right is doing better with men, they aren't shaming them for existing and only acknowledging them as being pieces of shit.

It's frustrating because there's days where I want to say fuck it and go join the other side and I think the left actually wants that more than the right does because they validate men who do it and men who stick with the left? "Yeah whatever do you want a medal?"

How about to be recognized as the gender I identify as and a human being? Apparently too much to ask when it's a man.

top 11 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

"you’re not really a man unless you hate women". This is so true. I wish I knew better why this rift between sexes is so useful in politics. When talking about sex, we have to seek what we have in common, not our differences. If sexual attraction was a problem for deep relationships, then gay men wouldn't always be together. This sexually divisive standard serves someone right. Women should look at this more carefully.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

inb4 trying to engage with an obvious bait post

I'm not sure what you mean by "acknowledge men". Can you expand on that?

I would agree that the left tends to pick on men, but you seem to be probing at something other than "the left picks on men while the right doesn't", and I'm not clear what that is.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That if a man says "hey I'm a man I don't want to be picked on I want to be accepted for who I am" the response isn't "ah ok cool sounds good we want that for everyone", it's a dismissal and assumption that being a man means you already are accepted or don't need community outside of what men are painted to be.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

First off, thanks for an honest and non-shitpost response (there's got to be a better way to phrase that but its not coming to me atm).

I don't think the problem is as severe or systemic as you're making it out to be. I think if the individual you're speaking to lashes out at the mention of you being a man, then that individual is an asshole and that's just kinda the end of it.

Can you give some concrete examples you've experienced/seen of this? I'm unfamiliar with the community rules on linking to other posts (and app doesn't let me save comments drafts to double check), but if that's allowed and you can link to examples of this (since it seems like you're referencing online interactions), I'd appreciate it.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean I just got told on Bluesky that it's ok to say "men.... Negative think" And it's everyone else's responsibility to know you really just mean specific men and I'm telling on myself as one of those men for taking any issue with the practice.

Hell the post I was originally replying to had screenshots of people being shitty to men and the response to them was that random posts aren't proof when like yes that's how proof works, but the goalpost gets moved to "well it's not a real problem" and downplayed instead of anyone just defusing the situation by saying "yeah that sucks, people shouldn't be shitty to men just like they shouldn't be shitty to women".

I'm not keeping a collection of posts nor do I think it's this sweeping universal thing, I run into posts being shitty and ignore them and move on until I make a vent post about it but I'm not tracking them as they happen, which apparently you need to because that's the other counter, that anecdotes aren't proof, which agreed they aren't, but it's telling IMO that the reaction to guys saying they feel this way is usually a lot more charged and accusatory than a guy saying he doesn't like the current state of things.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah, I don't necessarily disagree with anything you're saying in this or your other comment (to be absolutely clear, I'm saying I mostly agree with you). While I don't think the problems are necessarily systemic, I do agree there's a lot of folks who like to beat up on dudes for existing as a dude.

until I make a vent post

I think this is where I got the wrong impression. I assumed you were trying to hit at a solution (beyond "everyone should be more cognizant of how they talk to people), but it this is just you venting frustrations, then I hope it helped and I hope you don't get any backlash from letting out your frustrations. Lol, I don't know that I know if a better place for it, but I don't think this is your best venue.

"men.... Negative think"

One last thing though: what do you mean by this? The way its framed, it sounds like you mean it as a literal quote....but I'm not sure what context that could exist in to make that make sense?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

men… Negative think”

One last thing though: what do you mean by this? The way its framed, it sounds like you mean it as a literal quote…but I’m not sure what context that could exist in to make that make sense?

Oops I meant "men... Negative thing" as in a statement starting with men followed by a negative statement (e.g. men are such pigs!)

And I am venting frustrations but also saying it's a vent post because of the powerlessness to enact a solution outside of my immediate reach, which is the real solution is do what is can to be better to people I interact with and it will spread but it's one thing irl and one thing with social media where it's a beast trying to defeat better communication with "engagement", it's fighting an uphill battle. Can't dismantle the master's house with the master's tools as they say.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

Just don't take statements like that personally. Majority of my friends are guys and we all acknowledge that we've met many other guys (unfortunately) who fall into the category of "toxic men".

It's annoying if every time someone wants to make a statement about a group of people they need to specify that they don't mean the group in it's entirety. Eg. queer men have a problem with hookup culture. The average queer man will not be offended if they acknowledge that this is indeed a problem in the community- regardless of if I am part of said problem or not.

On the other hand I can understand why seeing such statements could be upsetting if you consider being a man a core part of your identity. The best way to prevent comments and blanket statements like these, is to reduce the rate at which the sort of situations that lead to them occur like you said. Because just like you're venting right now, they're probably just venting their frustrations as well. It's honestly very concerning how much nonsense women and especially girls go through.

Long story short, unfortunately this is an issue you're just going to have to deal with until the world figures out some way to dismantle the patriarchy. At least majority of these statements are online so it might be easier to ignore them 🤷‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Feels like I'm being baited here...

As (I am) a full swing left cis het white guy, you're feeling written off because people aren't acknowledging you?

Man I'm pretty happy to apologize for the arrogance exhibited by the majority of my ilk, to be acknowledged that we aren't all like that, and to have it never be brought up again. I don't need a spotlight shone on me, my troubles are the same as most people's, except I'm not fighting to keep my rights or having my character questioned because of my nature (something that I've noticed should probably be happening more, but I'm among the privileged that are first overlooked).

You voted for Kamala, did you also vote for Obama twice? And would've a third time? Paying lip service and voting are the absolute minimums you could do, and I don't think you can say we aren't represented by the left wing when we have newsome, sanders and 50% (number from my ass) of the rest of the left wing elected officials representing cishet white guys, and those who aren't are still representing us, I've not heard 1 of them say "down with white guys".

I come from Christopher Titus 'love is evol' school, "I'm whitie and I apologize" I don't need any more help or acknowledgement than what I'm given getting to exist in this society built around people like me for me, I just want to see others share in the privilege that I've existed in my entire life.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah this is obvious bait.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I probably just added ammunition to the algorithm for how to deal with people when these asinine questions are posed, I'm a bad future citizen. My grandkids (lol) will question why I acknowledge these obvious traps and keep taking for future scams... Back in my day I trained these things, of course they're going to get me every time.