Canada

high level figures in the EU have repeatedly stated that while they appreciate the gesture, Canada wont ever be a member.

Who? I haven't heard anything so definitive.

When it comes down to the details, the EU is a boys club for Western and Central Europe, they dont even treat their Eastern members as anything more than a buffer zone against the Russians,

Lol, no. The east gets tons and tons of subsidies. It's the whole reason Orban still wants to be in the EU.

You'll also notice new eastern countries are lining up to join while euroskepticism has made headway in your "boy's club" countries.

the EU isnt flawless either, Russia has infiltrated it with trojan horse governments like the Hungarian Fidesz party and the Slovakian SMER party, who embezzle EU funds and politically roadblock motions with their veto.

Definitely true. The difference is that the US is terminal in a 1933 Germany way, while the EU seems like it might have a bright future.

Russia has infiltrated it with trojan horse governments like the Hungarian Fidesz party and the Slovakian SMER party, who embezzle EU funds and politically roadblock motions with their veto

Unfair considering CIA infiltration of rest of EU. Not gaslighting their people with Russophobia warmongering is a sane position that has created FDI and growth exceeding rest of EU, as in rest of free (non US colonized) world.

At any rate, trade deals with EU is awesome to pursue. A political union with extreme hate groups who beg for greater US subservience to increase their hate is very dangerous for Canada to submit to. CIA control over all western democracies makes gaslighting on US resistance easy, and push comes to shove, EU would happily help destroy Canada if it gives them more US brownie points. EU faked interest in a trade deal with Ukraine in 2013, only to have US controlled (with EU puppet votes) IMF sabotage it, and assist in coup against Ukrainian president who trusted EU.

EU is simply not reliable, even if Canadians programming aligns with their current chaos. Canada wanting it more than EU is a recipe for failure.

let me give you a counter argument as a german citizen:

The EU is still a union of a multitude of countries, all pretty different in their approach on geopolitics, economy and security. But we are a union that has brought peace for the longest time Europe ever had uninterupted. We aren't totally homogenous when it comes to values, but we align each other pretty well. Hungary, Slovakia, at times Poland (although since 2020 their rhetoric has been largely overlooked) are doing their best blocking progress, but they aren't really in a position to do so for much longer. Among european unionists and federalists there has also been talk about a multi-level EU model, where you don't have to 100% commit to EU regulations and laws, and still enjoy the benefit of the european singlemarket, possibly Schengen-Access, or at least visa free.

So, never say never ;)