lmao I can't believe that line is actually in the description :D
Terrible Estate Agent Photos
Terrible photos listed by estate agents/realtors that are so bad they’re funny.
Posting guidelines.
Posts in this community must be of property (inside or out) listed for sale which contains a terrible element. “Terrible” can refer to:
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the photo itself (finger over the lens, too far away, people in the shot, bad Photoshop, etc.)
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the property (weird layout, questionable plumbing, unsound structure, etc.)
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the interior (carpeted bathrooms, awful taste interiors, weird mannequins/taxidermies/art, inflatable pools indoors, etc.)
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the actual listing itself including unusual descriptions and unrealistic pricing. However, this isn’t a community to discuss the housing market in general. This is a comedic community - let’s keep it light.
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Photos can be sourced from anywhere and be any age, but please check they haven’t already been posted.
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Censor any names/contact details of private individuals.
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Mark the post NSFW if it includes nudity or sensitive content
Rules.
This community follows the rules of the feddit.uk instance and the lemmy.org code of conduct. I’ve summarised them here:
- Be civil, remember the human.
- No insulting or harassing other members. That includes name-calling.
- Respect differences of opinion. Civil discussion/debate is fine, arguing is not. Criticise ideas, not people.
- Keep unrequested/unstructured critique to a minimum.
- Remember we have all chosen to be here voluntarily. Respect the spent time and effort people have spent creating posts in order to share something they find amusing with you.
- Swearing in general is fine, swearing to insult another commenter isn’t.
- No racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia or any other type of bigotry.
- No incitement of violence or promotion of violent ideologies.
It definitely needs work but it's not that bad.
One bathroom for three bedrooms. That would never work for me. We'd have a school yard returning from recess line every morning for poop and shower time.
Poop and shower? Waffle stomp?
Eww yucky. I hope not.
Our dump is a very, very, very large dump
With fountains on the wall
Santa used to be so warm
I wonder how it smells... and maybe how many died there...
Seeing the photos, and having been around way too many deceased estate properties, I can instantly smell the whole place.
Damp, old plaster, manky carpets, and the bathroom that smells faintly of old wee and Imperial Leather.
$750k in Seattle area for worse
That's a lot of water damage
That price is insane considering how much work needs to be done to make it livable
...and that you'd have to live in Portsmouth :)
😱
There are number of replacement windows
"1 is a number"
In all seriousness though I don't think it's fair to blame the estate agent for being terrible, guy is doing the best he can after getting handed a shit sandwich, but still being upfront about the condition.
Not sure I buy that the roof is okay, with that peeling ceiling. I guess a tub or toilet could be above it.
A 1200sqft 3/1 is considered large? I guess I don’t know UK standards.
Also, what do they mean by “no forward chain”? Is that like a monthly HOA fee?
All relative, in a city (albeit not that desirable) the housing stock will be smaller so I suspect the agent means relative to other houses.
It means the sellers are not buying a house using the proceeds from this sale. Usually means the sale will be quicker.
Sounds like “no contingencies” in the US
Not quite the same thing I think.
My understanding of "no contingency" is more to do with inspections, certifications etc. I.e. an offer has been made that isn't going to be cancelled if the structural survey comes back with a load of issues to fix.
"Chains" in UK real estate lingo are about whether your sale is tied to other sales. For example, if you're buying a house from an owner-occupier who won't move out (and give you your new house) until the new house that they're buying is ready- that's an onward chain. A chain in the other direction would be someone who says that they'll buy a house, but will only have the money to make the purchase once they've got a sale locked in for their current house. Selling a house with "no onward chain" is telling the buyer that they can have it as soon as they've got the money, and that the seller isn't waiting for anything.
Chains can get very messy and complicated, as you can end up with s dozen house sales all tied up with each other waiting for one house in the chain to be ready to go before any of the others can go.
You’re talking about buyer contingencies.
This is basically “No seller contingencies “ in US lingo.
Is that a pink tub? Gotta restore that! I just got through restoring the pink tub in our old house and it's got so much character!
I couldn't live with that bathroom, it'll have to go
The bathroom in my first house had a full avocado suite (bath, sink, toilet and medicine cabinet) with a neon green shag pile carpet.
I would have suffered with the fixtures, but that carpet would have been ripped up as soon as I found a deal on some decent tiles that don't clash with the fixtures.
I got rid as soon as I had the money because I wanted a shower. Something that wasn't present as it was rare in houses here in the UK until at least the early '90s.
I recently went to a viewing of a place with a bathroom in that style. Interestingly, the owner had decided he needed a shower cabinet in addition to the bathtub/shower combo in the bathroom, but as there was no more room in there he/she placed the shower cabinet in the bedroom, next to the bed. On shag pile carpet. There was mold everywhere, and the carpet in the bedroom kinda looked like something that had been used as a rag in a machine workshop for a decade or two.
Give it the benefit of the doubt, it survived the great war!
The tankless water heater located in the shower is the best.
How bout that picture #3 tho
Free sex doll, lightly used.