this post was submitted on 20 Oct 2024
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Becoming a parent is not necessarily about trauma and anxiety - not everyone reacts this way, some people genuinely enjoy becoming parents, including women. What I think is kind of almost universal though, is the new responsibility. That can force you to mature too.
I fully agree on the losing loved ones part.
The only time in my life I ever enjoyed singing, was singing nonsense songs to my little ones
As my little ones graduated from toddlers to kids, I rediscovered my love for Lego
As my little ones graduated from kids to teens, I rediscovered my love for sports. I’ve never gotten so excited to watch a game as when my kid is playing
Damn right some of us really enjoy being parents. Damn right being parents can help some of us rediscover some of the joys of childhood. And it’s not just for women
No. There's a great deal of joy in being a parent, too. But a big part of caring for a child - particularly a toddler or per-adolecent - is having one eye open to the child's safety, constantly. Kids be doing crazy shit. Its normal and healthy, from a development perspective. But terrifying for a caretaker, whenever the kid behaves recklessly (or in any way the caretaker perceives as reckless).
Its an inherent trade-off. Watching a kid walk for the first time or ride a bike for the first time inevitably means watching them fall or crash. The agony and the ecstasy.
I know very well what you're talking about and I feel pretty competent to say that not everyone reacts with anxiety or even trauma to a reckless child. Not everyone's feelings are on the same level in the same situation.