Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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Who do you need to be good enough to? You are good enough as you are. If you want to change/improve anything about yourself, do it because you want to. Check if you can find support groups and/meetups in your area. Maybe try volunteering at places where they don't care about things like this. Don't get these things get to your head. You don't have to pretend everything is great. You can choose to ignore these things and seek more fulfilling things that go beyond your physical characteristics.
Anyone. It isn't about my physical characteristics. I just want to help people and instead I just get ridiculed and critiqued. I'm tired of being alone and sad. My cat is the only reason I haven't killed myself, and I don't know how much longer he can hold that dam.
What I have found is that when the whole world seems and feels to hate/ridicule you, all you need is a few people who love/accept you in your life to begin with. I would sincerely advise you to seek out these people in real, daily life. Places like https://foodatfirst.com/ in your city/state, where you can go volunteer and they would welcome you. Or find a new hobby and visit some hobby related places, like a board game cafe or something similar. One thing to remember is that the mind can spiral if left on a particular thought alone for a long while, so please find activities/people that help you divert your thoughts and attention in a different, healthy, direction.
First I want to say I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, and I know we're just internet strangers, but we care; I care. I went through a really bad year about one year ago, the cat thing hits hard, I was exactly there.
Please consider talking to someone professional, and if you aren't ready (it took me months to finally make an appointment) take care of yourself as much as you can in the meantime. I only did about 12 weeks over the phone (and it was surprisingly affordable, if that factors for you). CBT really helped me deal with a lot of the same issues, I was looking to please everyone, but myself.
Talking through and challenging some of the really toxic beliefs I had, especially around if I'm important, helped so much. I'm living my best life and finding my joy for me, and it's starting to snowball into a full blown social life. I struggled so much with the "what's the point" question, and wasn't even sure if I had an answer after my last session, but I'm living the answer now and I'm so thankful for my cat.