this post was submitted on 01 Jul 2024
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Transfem
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Maybe not as pretty as you, but I'll take it. I will also turn 50 in a couple of years ago.
I feel you about the beard, I had mine for the better part of 20 years. My face was not pleased with me when I shaved. Shocked, even.
I'm one of those that managed to hide my inner girl even from myself until pretty recently. Oh, there were clues and signs aplenty but I didn't see 'em. I've never been classically feminine or even had classically feminine interests which is part of why it took me so long to understand. I'm more of a grease monkey biker chick. I know that's valid of course, but it did hamper my discovery. How much of that is me and much is "the mask", I don't know. I do buy and wear a lot of pink stuff too, so who knows? But I try to not worry too much about it, I can't go around second guessing everything I do.
But I always disliked what I saw in the mirror and a low self confidence is par for the course with that. I will try your method of convincing myself I've been wrong all these years. Can't hurt. As you say, we're beautiful. Now I just gotta believe it too. ๐
oh i'm stealing 'in a couple years ago' that's great.
I think one nice thing about transitioning later is it seems easier for us to not give a fuck. I sort of force-masced myself 30 years ago and now i'm delighting in undoing all of that.
The affirmations really work, especially if you say them out loud. A lot of advertising and self hypnosis works because the brain puts fewer filters between direct audio and your mind. If you distract the executive network and the salience network is relaxed your brain just kind of accepts things it hears at a low level.
Good luck darling I believe in you <3
I have already started the affirmations. Feels a little weird, but I think it will work. Thank you so much. <3