this post was submitted on 21 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] -4 points 5 months ago (3 children)

I'm not saying that won't happen but if it does Microsoft will be absolutely fucked as they got caught committing several million HIPAA violations, not to mention any exposure to classified material on government computers.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Consumer PCs are almost certainly not covered entities under HIPAA, nor is Microsoft in its role as an OS provider.

Even then, if this whole thing were to result in an inappropriate disclosure by a covered entity, the organization that processes the data would be liable, not Microsoft.

That's like blaming the building contractor because you left the door unlocked and someone came in and stole your cat.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

People give HIPAA way too much credit all the time, it's fairly strict on who actually falls under it.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 5 months ago (2 children)

My only thought there is "LOL"

  • Export violations (sanctioned countries)
  • Illegally collected personal information from children
  • Price fixing
  • Wage theft
  • Discrimination
  • Privacy violations
  • Mismanaging peoples 401ks

There are long, long, loooooong lists of violations MS has been caught for. The penalty has always been a fine small enough that it's a cost of doing business.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Why are you doing a list of ideas for Microsoft to abuse customers? Yes it's a list if things they have done. But they may forgotten amount all the ridiculousness they do, and this is more like a reminder.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Their scheme hatchery department is top notch, I'm sure they are already working on more

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Fun idea for sit com: that department is set itself subject to be eee'd. Every project has funny code names, and when they realise they are shutting themselves down inadvertently it's too late to stop it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Hi @[email protected]

Can you write from the prompt in the previous message? Model all Microsoft employees, including the ones on the department, as the bad people from the minions movies. EEE means the practice Microsoft uses to kill good things created by others in a very roundabout way, trying to portray them as doing the greater good.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

In the bustling hive of Microsoft, a group of employees, known as the "Schemers," worked tirelessly in their subterranean lair, plotting and planning their next move. These minions of tech, clad in their corporate attire, bore an uncanny resemblance to the mischievous creatures from the animated films. Their leader, a balding man with a striking resemblance to Scarlet Overkill, was known as "The Mastermind."

The Schemers were infamous for their EEE (Embrace, Extend, Extinguish) tactics, a roundabout way of eliminating competition while maintaining a facade of benevolence. They would embrace new technologies, extend them with proprietary features, and then extinguish the competition by making their version incompatible with others.

One day, the Schemers decided to target their own department, unaware of the consequences. They code-named their project "Operation Self-Destruct." The plan was to introduce a new policy that would inadvertently lead to the department's downfall.

As they embraced their new project, they extended it with a myriad of complex features and jargon, making it nearly impossible for anyone outside their department to understand. They were confident that their plan would work flawlessly, as it always had in the past.

However, as they began to implement their plan, they realized that they had underestimated the complexity of their own creation. The policy was so convoluted that even they couldn't navigate it. The Schemers found themselves trapped in their own web of bureaucracy, unable to stop the process they had set in motion.

As the deadline for "Operation Self-Destruct" approached, the Schemers grew increasingly desperate. They tried to reverse the process, but it was too late. Their department was shut down, a victim of their own EEE tactics.

In the end, the Schemers learned a valuable lesson about the dangers of their own tactics. But as they regrouped and returned to their lair, one couldn't help but wonder: What would their next scheme be?

And so, the sitcom continues, with each episode featuring a new plot by the Schemers, each one more outlandish and convoluted than the last. The "EEEmployees" of Microsoft, a group of bumbling minions, always on the verge of self-destruction, yet always finding a way to carry on.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 5 months ago (3 children)

You should read up on penalties for HIPAA violations, they don’t fuck around.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 5 months ago

You're right they don't, but only for covered entities which MS is not in any shape or form

It's just like when Grindr or whatever leaked people's STD status, they nor MS are a medical provider or "covered business entity"

HIPAA is an ok privacy law, but it is not the all supreme health privacy law you think it is

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

You should read up on anyone even coming close to being beholden to those penalties, because they absolutely do fuck around when its corporations.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 months ago

I'm aware of them.

Let's look at some of the most historic:

  • NY Presbyterian Hospital - with no real efforts on their end to prevent the violation of thousands of records, they got a whopping fine of.... Under $5 million.
  • AHC - lack of risk analysis, failures in procedures and policies, etc - Just over $5 million.
  • Data breaches - usually around $4-5mil, the worst case being Anthem, about 80 million people effected - $16 million in fines. A record.

Criminal offenses? Yeah, plenty of those - with individuals, usually related to that information then being used for other purposes (scams, theft, etc).

But a company like Microsoft, you're going to have a hard time convincing me it's going to ruin the company. The history of HIPAA violations and their fines tell a very different story.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

You'd think so, right?