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My partner has it to.
Sometimes it is a fast. Finger in there. I call it the 'check if this is still female'. It waked me up but nothing more. Frustrates me more than you can immagine.
There is the longer time having his hand over my tits. Iff he gets to playing with the nippels I start joining. Manuelly getting him hard and during his sleep he still doos the rest.
Rarely we have the 'wet noodle is lonely'. Tries to hump but... Nothing more. Also waked me up ;(.
My favorite ( the haha type ) is when he starts talking. 'come fucking' 'frick frick frick' 'now now yes now' 'legs open... fock'. Often it is when he is a bit wilder. Rolling up me and starting the penetration. He speeks often in his sleep btw. Not only for sexxy times.
My favorite ( the oh yes type ) When it comes to sex and I have fun.
The next morning I always ask 'When during fucking you woke up?' Sometimes he had the ' i did it again?' Sometimes it is ' somewhere during being inside you. I did xxx. What happened befor ?'
He always (when he can t remember ) thinks it is sad. He misses a bit off the sexy and nice times between us like that.
But tbh... I m the one with the bigger sexdrive. An extra turn when it did not happen when going to bed is for me always welcome.
My partner is 40 and I am 41. We are 13 years together. He has SSRI medication / ADHD stuff and some other medication. Sometimes beta-blockers and atm he takes something that has as a side effect to sleep better. He has often stress at work.
We were looking if the sexsomnia was stress-related but even when it happend than a bit more. It is not only during those times. We have no ID about a trigger.
Now it is yust a part off our relation. Could be months without the sleep-fucking and than in one week 3 times.
We have a good relation. When I found out he has it... We talked. He was upset after hearing what he did and said.
You sound like a great couple!
As the other half of said couple, thanks! I can corroborate ;) The secret (imho) is communication. I try to model my way of communication/love language after my grandparents, who are approaching their 90's and are very much still in love.
O ;) You want to share a bit more about that waking up during - feeling.
Tkx. We do think so.