this post was submitted on 10 Jan 2024
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Emotional Labor is for the individual to do. If you feel like you need help, that's what a therapist is for. Do you expect a gf to be your therapist? Sharing and expressing feelings is a normal part of a relationship, but expecting your SO to also be your own personal therapist is completely unhealthy. Everyone has their own emotional Labor to do, why should anyone else (who's not a therapist) be expected to do yours?
uhhh, yeah, my wife and i try to be the best therapist we can be for each other. not wanting to do that for the person you love seems weird to me.
I'm talking about an unhealthy codependency that can happen when someone with a developed fight-response pairs with someone with a developed fawn-response. It sounds like you two have a healthy relationship where you can discuss each other's problems with each other freely. Which is good.
Personally, no I wouldn't expect my partner to unravel my own personal cPTSD for me. I would work on it myself and with a therapist need be. Discussing my progress and thoughts on my own cPTSD and hearing my partner's is a healthy thing to do.
Because part of a healthy relationship involves sharing with your partner and helping them through their struggles, emotional or otherwise?
I literally said that. The difference is sharing your own progress in a healthy way compared to expecting your SO to do the progress for you