Cats after entering a human stranger's house: Look at me. I'm the meowner now.
Humans: Yes, oh cute one!
this post was submitted on 21 Dec 2024
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The fact that only two creature in this world that will approach another creature 10 times bigger than them just so they get adopted is pretty impressive. That's how i adopted my 4th cat, little baby dude just came out from under a car and yell at me until i pick him up.
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When I was a kid Mr Kitty unilaterally moved in despite belonging to the neighbors across the street and the stern objections of my father armed with a squirt gun.
I never liked cats at all and one did exactly that. Stupid fuck make me fall absolutely in love with it too.
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Oh sure, when the cat walks into a house and wants to live there, they're all "omg it's so cute" and "let's go buy it food and a bed", but when I do it, they're all "who the hell are you?" and "leave or I'm calling the cops" :(
Have you tried meowing at them?
don't do this. it only made things escalate in my experience
Don't pick a house with a dog next time.
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Do you think it's the same way with viruses entering body cells?
Nah, I assume it's more like some unconscious dude shows up at your house with a weirdly sharp penis, he impregnates the house, and then the house explodes and a bunch of little dudes spill out.
One dildo through the window IN, thousands of dildos through the walls OUT. Got it.
I shudder to write this, but it's more like a self-replicating knife dildo. Or a sawzall.
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Cats are the perfect human parasite.
Did cats domesticate humans, or did Toxoplasma gondii domesticate both of us?
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Gaslighting is so last year. We need new slang - fenceposting, backyarding, BarneyRubbling.
Your PFP is blank
Humans are just exceptionally weak to cute. If aliens ever show up and try to conquer us, we're going to be so screwed if they happen to be adorable.
Even if they were horrors beyond our comprehension, a whole lot of people would be still be very sexually aggressive towards them.
Honestly that may be what saves us. They try to manipulate us by being cute, we weird them out by being horny.
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There's a Philip K Dick short story about this, "The war with the Fnools"
Aww nibbler
If aliens turn up and they're like "Give me snacks. And a fluffy bed." I think we'd be like "...aight."
Speak for yourself, I hope the furry aliens make me their pet.
I would love the life of a house pet as long as I can play video games instead of sleeping all the time.
We just collectively need to convince our new overlords that it’s enrichment and just let me keep it I already have it, and I’ll be totally friendly and compliant whenever you want, I can pause, it’s cool.
Yeah, I mean I can multitask licking their tentacles while I game.
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It's all fun and games until de-worming time.
How many people have worms? I thought that was rare... Am I missing something and Kennedy is actually not an odd-ball?
Not many people have them, but the aliens don't know which ones - and they already have the anal probe equipment handy.
Shit, here I thought we were all going to just take heart guard haha. Your way doesn't sound as fun.
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Well, I guess you're getting screwed anyways
Maybe he likes getting screwed.
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Cats never domesticated themself, since ever they are specialists in domesticate humans, for commodity, not for need.
Spot on. Cats are the OG scientists who stuck around to see what they could make us do after they discovered monkeys gave good tummy rubs.
Yadda-yadda, we industrialize food production and build awesome cozy dens to live in, yadda-yadda, they're watching us burn the world like, "fascinating... now, can I make the monkey give me treats 2 minutes earlier than this time last week..."
Only reason they don't have us outright worshipping them is we tried it once or twice, but things got weird.
I love all cats, and they are free to walk inside anytime they want. Just no fighting in the house.
Is anyone else bothered by people saying their cat is lost? -No; it left a toxic relationship! "They stole my cat" -Nah, it moved out!
Or something got to it. Pretty sure that's what happened to our outside childhood cat. Miss ya up there, Rover.
People always say they look cute and yea sure,
But did y'all forget the fact that they can literally get rid of all your mice problems?
I got a cat because for companionship and one month later, all those filthy mice are gone.
Being soft and warm to pet, and the beautiful meows, are just the cherry on top of their lovely companionship.
They -can- do that yes. Whether or not they will choose to, however, is anyone’s guess.
Even if you have a lazy cat, mice have since learned to avoid the smell of cat pheromones. So just having a fat furball laying around will make it more likely the local mice go bother your neighbor instead.
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They will have a joyous time with it. And you might find eviscerated mice under your couch one day. But my two dumbass fur balls just thought they were awesome toys.
Never figured out quite when they stopped coming in. The only really humane way to kill em is snap traps. I probably went through a couple dozen of them before they stopped showing up.
I was against using poisoned food traps because the last thing I wanted was my cat consuming a poisoned mouse. But, since our whole neighborhood had a problem with the mice, I wouldn't be too surprised if a neighbor did it.
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They rarely need to in the city, also those that weren't taught by other cats most of the time won't kill the mouse just torture it or scare.
Well, whatever my cat did, the mice are gone so... 🤷♂️
I did see a few dead mice around the first 2 months, now no sight of mice.
You are lucky, in my previous flat there were hoarders-alcoholics that lived on the next floor, one day they brought mice with whatever shit they decided to take. At first they were contained on their floor, but after a while they were everywhere. Cat played with them at first >_< and then got bored. After 10 or so that traps killed (in a month) I moved out.
Your experience reminded me of "Tom," the farm cat who lived in the corn silo on my great aunt's farm. He avoided/hated children but tolerated the adults who worked there. Depending on the season, he killed multiple mice a day, ate only their livers (leaving behind a trail of bodies), and used crippled mice to track down the hidden others. Tom was a true professional—and honestly, quite terrifying.
Edit: My aunt "paid" him with leftover spaghetti, ground meat, and eggs, as well as a warm spot by the oven in the winter (if he chose to stay there). He was "semi-feral"—never going near the house during the summer months.
Edit2 + Spelling,Typos,Grammar,
What the fuck kinda Hannibal Lecter cat...
Ive always wondered about the poor villagers who lived in tigers territory. Every night a kitty comes out to play.
One of my calicos likes eating the bottom half of lizards and leaving them alive. She's a sadist.
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They are funny, don't really need a lot of space and training, and look pretty. Ofc I will go and by whatever.