It's been trending this way for years, but seeing it graphed out like this is shocking.
What do you think are the effects of this drastic change?
That is insane.
this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
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Now do how they split!
Give me $50/month and I'll find you some random stranger 😉💕! I used craigslist and found a perfectly good used girlfriend. 15 years and she's still going!
It's so sad to see real life vanishing
Is it just me or is that graph all fucked up?
Definitely. This graph is how folks on Grindr hooked up.
Well theres more then 0 percent that do meet multiple people throughout the year. So maybe still bullshit, but its a thought.
I'm kind of surprised that College has always been low
Only about 1/3 of Americans have an undergrad degree. And that's up from the 25% from roughly 15 years ago.
In earlier generations more people didn't even go to college. If you're in the 70% of silent generation that never went to college, you're certainly not going to meet a spouse there. Especially if you attended a university that was only for one gender.
I just like that it looks like a cuttlefish.
Before I was a ten, my mother was desperate to leave her home state and met a man online/a romantic post, moving states away. Had to be 1997, 1998.
Where i grew up no one had my values or my interests. My spouse of 10+ years i met on a free MMO back in 2010s we both happened to play and got to know each other there, then after a year chatting daily on cam, phone calls, and dms we met up.
So "meeting online" is really vague and can mean a lot of things. It's also gone from being new, some dating apps may help people connect, to being enshittified. Never used it for dating but OK cupid WAS ok at looking for like minded friends for like a second.
But people sharing hobbies and falling for wach other probably will always happen even as the apps suck.
I wouldn't have found someone geographically near me with my same morals and hopes and wants out of life. I have never found "my parents and your parents birthed us here and so maybe we should get married" to be enough common ground.
Just got married to my wife this last weekend, who I met after being on Bumble for about 2 weeks... Gotta go buy some scratchers.
I remember being in highschool in the late 90s/early 2000s and someone found out I had an online dating profile.
I was relentlessly teased about it, borderline bullying.
I eventually met my current wife online, couldn't be happier.
looking back, the teasing was likely because I was the only genuinely nice guy those girls knew and were upset their choices for dates were abysmal. it's all for the best though, I wouldn't have wanted to be around anyone who could treat me that way and be ok with it.
I'm pleased that the stigma against online dating has all but vanished.
The last really serious relationship started by meeting at a bar.
It was great because there was no expectations when we first started talking so the conversation was just natural, just two people talking. We exchanged numbers and soon started dating. I really think that it worked was because it was just an accidental meeting and we were both relaxed and had no ulterior motive.
I also think because dating in the wild there are fewer filters and few options, so you go with what you got. They may not be perfect but it's better than sitting around swiping for the perfect person that may not exist.
They may not be perfect but it’s better than sitting around swiping for the perfect person that may not exist.
I actually appreciate having information on personality, background, hobbies and dating intentions up-front, rather than play a guessing game for hours or days.
Yes. There is nothing bad about having some more information up front, but in my experience some people will describe themselves as they think others want to see them and not always who they are. In which case it can take a few hours, days or even months before you really start to see who they are.
When I was dating in the late 2000's and early 2010's, I remember adding dates as friends on Facebook, somewhere around the first date, specifically to be able to get a sense of their personality/background/interests, and to show off mine, even for people I met in person.
It wasn't online dating through a dating app, but online presence was still a huge part of the actual process.
Even before that, in the early 2000's, I remember stuff like AIM profiles that could at least link to photo albums that show off things that you've done recently. And even then having always-on broadband Internet, to where we'd be logged into AIM or ICQ, was its own flex.
Yup. I'm an awkward fellow but still have far better results approaching people in bars than on apps. People on apps are constantly pursuing the perfect match (including their perfect match) so everyone is collectively disappointed.
If anyone is jumping into this thread: ctrl+f "fake". There is a good discussion about the data that you shouldn't miss.
Thanks, yeah that's why I came here. For me though it is that a few percent got together in 1980 / early 80s. Now I vaguely remember the 80s and the "internet" from then. I can't imagine any got together from "online dating" then or the internet overall. Do you have a concept of what "internet" was then?
No not really, I grew up in the 90s. Internet was mostly gaming and university websites for me
For me, the big question isn't what are the effects, but rather, what is the cause?
I see this as an effect of something else that other effects of could be mistaken as symptoms of this here.
Basically, the destruction of third spaces and public life in general has caused an increasing number of people to find relationships (both romantic and platonic) online because they no longer have the opportunity in their daily life. That, and the increased ease of long distance relationships and meeting people from far away means that people are probably more likely to have the opportunity to fall in love with somebody outside of their tiny corner of the world.
speaking from my own personal experience. options for dates were lackluster and I couldn't get what I wanted out of the relationships I had so, I looked elsewhere.
especially in small rural communities where the opportunities to expand your experience in mature relationships. most the dates I had were, "let's get wasted and fuck on this dirt road" or "let's get drunk around the bon fire with all our friends and go fuck in the woods". sound nice, but if it's the only option every weekend it gets old.
I wanted a personal connection to someone outside of getting drunk and having sex, others are fine with it.
Meeting online seems like the best way to me. Better to date people you have stuff in common with rather than just picking your partners through circumstance.
A lot of people here are too young to get it, but work being a captive dating scene for skeezy shameless assholes is a million times worse than online dating.
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