this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Look at Mr. Fancypants over here with his doctor.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I bleedin wish.

In the whole of 2022 I was sick and couldnt get anyone to see me. Managed to get 2 blood tests which gave me nothing. Finally got an appointment last May. Pretty much every GPs is like that now sadly.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Then when they do see you, they try to get you in/ out as quickly as possible without providing any actual help.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

Definitely. Though thats been going on since the Blair years tbh.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I can't really afford doctors generally, but I was in another country soon after turning 40 and I decided to get a full checkup on the cheap. I was steeling myself for the prostate exam. Imagine my surprise and relief when they gave me a goddam ultrasound instead! Like they would for a pregnant lady! Cold gel on the belly and all. They gave me the exact volume of my prostate in decilitres. So yeah, that is apparently an option.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

Thats pretty cool. I've worked for the NHS for years and never heard of that, but it makes sense.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 5 months ago (2 children)

I want a doctor with large hands. 😏

[–] [email protected] 1 points 5 months ago

Bonk! Horny jail

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'm reminded of a certain Tool song 😅

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago* (last edited 5 months ago)

You do an ænima before hand specifically so the doctor doesn't end up with a stinkfist.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 5 months ago (1 children)

One of god's best practical jokes was putting the male g-spot in our ass. It's up to you whether you're in on the joke or not

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 months ago

5 downvotes here feels like Corporal Jones Dad's Army is shouting out at us 😂

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (2 children)

This is a true shitpost bc this is not the standard anymore. The PSA blood test can catch prostate cancer much earlier and reliably.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago (1 children)

According to my urologist it's not conclusive because your PSA value will also be above norm if you have a naturally large prostate.

To get a reliable diagnosis you need to measure the prostate volume by ultrasound and guess where that probe goes.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 months ago

That's ok. Blood test first (least invasive) then move on to ultrasound. The point is there's no good reason to have someone digitally probe your anus anymore.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 months ago

The NHS will never pay for a bloodtest when you will ruin the GP's fun. 😅

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)

Lucky you op. I've had nurses put suppositories and enemas up the backside as well as a gastroentoligist stick a finger up there.

I'm only 27 but I've bowel disease.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 months ago (1 children)

I'm sorry to read that. Is it curable or part of a longer condition you have to cope with?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago

Chronic disease so I'll have to live with it.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 5 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 months ago

.

General Practitioner. Doctor.