Were you surprised by the diagnosis and has it held you back?
I have this disorder myself. Although when I was diagnosed back in 81 we didn't have these fancy terms like "anti-social personality disorder" it was just sociopath/psychopath back then.
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Were you surprised by the diagnosis and has it held you back?
I have this disorder myself. Although when I was diagnosed back in 81 we didn't have these fancy terms like "anti-social personality disorder" it was just sociopath/psychopath back then.
"Were you surprised by the diagnosis"
Yes I was. I had known about ASPD and always through of people who had it as serial killers and abusers. When I was diagnosed there was an awkward moment where I was like "so... I guess I'm a sociopath now๐๐ฅ"
"has it held you back?"
No but it could. Nobody but me and the person who diagnosed me knows but if I ever get dragged to court I now have a piece of paper that makes me look bad and if anyone did a medical background check on me it wouldn't be a good look to say the least.
How does remorse/guilt work for you? Is it just absent? A vague concept? Or is it fundamentally there but really easy to ignore?
A vague concept is the best way to put it. I can understand the concepts on a intellectual level but I just don't feel them. Like, I can understand regretting something because it hurt someone else but I don't know how you can feel someone else's pain. It's the same for guilt. ASPD gives you an extremely short time preference. If I make a bad decision once I'm done dealing with the consequences I don't really think about it. The future is in the future so why really care and the past is the past. It's for this reason I don't feel anything for the people involved.
I understand this isn't a good way of thinking about things. I understand I need to improve myself to stop these toxic patterns of thinking. I now make that I not only learn from my mistakes but put what I learnt into practice.
I may not feel empathy or guilt like a normal person but I can learn my short commings and work on them and at the end of the day that's what being a good person is all about.