this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2024
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Well, when clubbing I've often seen guys use the same mating strategy as street pidgeons.
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(2 replies)
I'd be a Canada Goose
Hey baby wanna ...... HOOOOOONNNKKKK!!!! .....
They also literally scream all day at the top of their lungs, "WANNA FUCK??"
Who Men or Birds? I mean that applies to both. If we are doing this whole sweeping generalization thing.
But seriously majority of Men aren't jerks. Just a surprising number of men who go around hitting/trying to get laid all the time are.
Haha yeah it is applicable to both sometimes. And agreed, it's the assholes that scream the loudest and make the normal people look bad.
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Yeah I hate it when I'm trying to enjoy myself at the park and there's a bunch of birds screaming at the top of their lungs about sex.
So selfish
Think of the poor children, we can't let this continue
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Tbh most real birds probably act like the last one.
Ducks don't even ask. They just rape. Most birds don't have a penis, but ducks do. It's for raping.
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Building a beautiful house is slightly more involved than weaving together some sticks and twigs that you found.
Pigeon nests are even shittier than that. They literally put some twigs down and call it a day. Honestly it's a wonder how they even survive. Google for 'pigeon nest' for a good laugh, they're just so terrible at it, like imagine a person giving bits of wood as a house.
Do birds have dicks? I'm not googling it
Most of them just touch butts
Ah, so just like humans
Ducks have a corkscrew shaped cock with explosive erections. There's slo mo shots on youtube.
Also, female ducks have corkscrew shaped vaginas they can contract or relax. This is to protect against rape and to only mate with desirable males. It's basically an arms race b/w duck dicks and vaginas. Ducks trying to be as as close to the vagina structure as possible, while the vagina tries to be as hard to get in (without consent) as possible.
Goat dicks are just as weird.
I guess I flirt like a bird.
You can definitely find men who flirt like all four of these examples.
I mean, the flaunting of sexual organs as an attempt to show fitness for mating isn't exactly unlike those things
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Pssh, this is completely untrue. The last time I impaled a bunch of small people and animals on a giant thorn, I didn't any attention. Well some, but the only from the police.
Okay but seriously giving shiny rocks to girls works pretty well. Not like jewelry or gemstones, literally just nice rocks.
One of my exes gave me a pebble, and said something about penguins giving a partner a pebble and they keep it for life. Pretty sure I lost it after a couple of weeks, and found a similar looking one and she never caught on ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Well I mean... Not exactly limited to girls. Who doesn't like a nice shiny rock? Nobody, that's who. Show me one person who claims to not have at least one good rock somewhere in their house. Can't do it can yeh? Didn't think so.
I got a rock last weekend that I'm still pumped about. I'm letting it just sit on top of my coffee table.
Edit: rock
Good rock
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Have you ever just sat and admired a well-tumbled stone? They're pretty to look at.
Bonus, if your person is the right type of crafty, they can turn those nice rocks into jewelry! I have a couple pieces my wife has made because they were just interesting stones she's found she thought I'd like.
Men, on the other hand, can be impressed by the gift of a good stick.
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Not all birds
Definitely not ducks.
My name is Duck and I'm here to fuck.
I'm a drake, you made a mistake.
This guy ducks
Fuzzy duck, ducky fuzz. Does he fuck? Fuck he does!
Lemme smash.
No, Ron. Go find Becky.
You wan... sum fuk?