This is a western world problem. In other countries this isn't as much of a problem.
this post was submitted on 02 Apr 2025
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Let me offer a scenario; two drunk people who wouldn't normally go near each other spend a night together. The morning comes, regret is in the air for both parties, which of these two people is most at risk?
The correct answer is: "the one who doesn't accuse the other on social media".
Just remember, no-one gave any indication of gender there. It's not really about gender at this point - it's the fact we've constructed a world where a casual encounter has the potential to become the prisoner's dilemma if it is regretted afterwards.
That's not a world where people take risks on a date, especially if physical intimacy is on the cards. To much risk!
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After my long relationship (7+), i started dating again. Unfortunately i discovered that no one is looking for a meaningful connection or a serious conversation. Everyone wants to catered and be heard, no one wants to listen for just a second. I actively stopped myself from flirting/dating anymore, it’s just a complete waste of time 🤷♂️im sorry to say many many many girls are VERY VERY superficial people.
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reading this thread I'm glad I'm a removed in a relationship. my spouse is the best. i got so fucking lucky.
there's a massive epidemic of loneliness out there. the loss of the free/cheap third spaces, lockdowns, and social media have made a fucking shitstorm. I'm scared for the generations below me just starting to enter the workforce. so many kids just unable to function properly.
i can't solve it. but I've been putting my devices down more and (trying) to get out more. get more sunlight and fresh air, even if i just sit outside and watch the ducks. it's hard out there. give yourself a break, okay? eat a snack and take a walk.
the loss of the free/cheap third spaces, lockdowns, and social media
I think that the growing push towards individualism and the dismantling of any kind of reciprocal relationship network are the main cause of this. I feel like years ago people could form sincere bonds and relationships but now everything is as atomised as possible and sincere interactions have been replaced with ironic performances to try to maintain as much distance as possible, even if unconsciously.
This obviously is great for the rich and powerful, so it's encouraged in media, pop culture, workplace regulations and organization, etc.
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Are the non-ace okay?