Blåhaj Lemmy is a Lemmy instance attached to blahaj.zone. This is a group for questions or discussions relevant to either instance.
Damn, I'm not one for drama but Holy shit their comments on that thread are fucked up, they seem like a really toxic and unhealthy bunch of people.
We're generally better off without extremists who's only defense to anything they don't like is attacking others and badmouthing them.
It really shows their general character and maturity levels.
Also, it seems like there are a lot of other instances asking mods for defederation due to toxicity.
I could not be more relieved.
On the one hand, it sucks that there is a rift between communities who seem to have genuine care for LGBTQ issues. However, through the past day, being exposed to Hexbear's community and content has made me extremely concerned.
Hexbear's server content is full of great big red flags. Even a brief skim through some top posts and comments showed a lot of content I found alarming. There are posts denying genocide, calls to violence, blatant Russian propaganda, apologists galore for authoritarianism, and the constant assurance that anyone not agreeing with these ideas was obviously a Fascist. And this was all wrapped in what I can only describe as a weird layer of smug superiority - that they are the only ones who "get it". I don't have a high opinion of any community that seems to think having the a word like "tankie" applied to them is problematic while accepting the previously mentioned content as okay. To make matters worse, a lot of Hexbear user's I've seen in other communities posting, it is often antagonistic if not just straight-up trolling. I just don't see the value in any of this.
I just wish we had become defederated sooner and not been exposed to a community that seems to be so rife with arrogant, extremist trolls that are hell-bent on stirring up drama.
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I didn't see the ableism, what did they say?
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I didn't call anyone braindead, and I left the slur in so that people would know what I said, and what I was apologizing for.
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They must have done something that wasn’t a full defed or haven’t done it yet. I literally just had a hexbear user respond to me in a blahaj post
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You cannot leave me because I'm leaving you, well that situation solved itself. That said I am concerned about 196.
Isn’t it funny how there were no complaints until there was a post here asking about defederation?
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What chaser things have I defended?? I'm trans I don't see how I could be a chaser and I don't even know what I could do to earn the title. It seems like this post was never brought to our attention, because we check every report we receive and remove the ones that should be removed. What we don't check, however, is every post as we do not have the mod numbers for that. We can only see what you guys bring to our attention through reports.
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Hi, that was me (on my kbin account). That's a quote pulled out of context. It was just a response to a direct question about whether I personally was attracted to trans men. It's not a fetishization.
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Oh yeah I remember this whole fiasco. The argument was literally just attraction to body types/features versus attraction to genders. This person was expressing that they're only attracted to archetypaly "female" body features but are open to dating any one of any gender identity. The whole fight is basically just people thinking that they're fetishizing trans men when they're just expressing that well they're fine with dating someone with a masculine identity, they don't think it would work if the person wasn't comfortable in a feminine body. I don't really want to get into this again, but there's nothing wrong with that in it of itself.
Some folks refuse to believe there are different levels of dysphoria. Like so many things, it's a spectrum.
Seriously! I'm transfem, have been for years, 2 years on hormones, but I have no problem with my voice. Let it be masculine! Who the fuck cares. It doesn't matter! Lot of trans people feel similar ways about different things
Due to hormone issues, I was basically presented with a choice to transition if I wanted. It was a serious consideration that I had to make. Took over a year to decide. I wished I was fem (still kinda do) but I couldn't part with my lil buddy. Femboys weren't really a thing back then, so yeah. Not every GQ person needs to want to undergo GRS to "qualify" as trans. Gatekeepy bullshit.
People are so caught up with hating hexbear users that the whole 196 mod drama is probably going to be overlooked. I'm waiting to see the statement from our instance mods before deciding if this place is really for me
What sort of statement? Except for the ableist comments that occurred last night when I was sleeping, everything else in that post had been actively addressed long before hexbear was on the scene.
The issues around ableism occurred when I was in bed, and I addressed them first thing this morning, removing the content in question and sending comms to the person in question making our standards clear.
They have a very different view of what constitutes an unsafe space, for the last day or so every time I saw a username with pronouns my whole body would tighten up anticipating some randomly aggressive attack post. I hate that they made me feel that way about something that should be good. I will not miss them.
One of them made a post on Egg_irl with Astolfo which seems to be almost saying that they think Femboys and GNC are just trans girls in denial. Really didn't sit well with me since I know that that kind of think is very hurtful to Femboys and has been very hurtful to me as well as an Agender.
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