While I think 'low t levels' is totally bullshit, are you sure your testosterone levels aren't elevated by the type of anti androgen you're using? Even estrogen is supposed to have some t reducing effects so having a higher than average t is curious
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This was before I started any form of HRT.
So my egg has (very) recently cracked, and I just so happen to have fresh T levels results at hand. Kinda shocked to find I apparently have higher T levels than 95-ish percent of cis men lol, was fully expecting the opposite.
Thank you for sharing both the graph and your story too, that's cool as heck! :)
Thank you for sharing this! I don't see this type of discussion often and it's important information.
I have a similar background, I was measuring at ~40nmol/L (~1150ng/dL), and it was probably higher than that when I was younger. I knew from early childhood that I wasn't cis, but by my mid-teens I was struggling with a lot of internal dissonance between my internal ethos and identity and how my hormonal state affected by emotions and cognition. There were also physiological issues from excessive T that I needed medical intervention to address. I struggled through that for years, but when I finally started HRT I very quickly found an enormous relief and much calmer and happier state of being.
Our cases are good examples of how more of the wrong hormonal profile doesn't make you cis. It might just make someone's problems worse and create new problems along the way.
I'd also add that it's okay if your testosterone is outside of cis women's range as long as your estrogen is higher. I was extremely worried that I was ruining my transition, but it really didn't and I still made excellent progress despite it. Certainly do all that you can to get it lower, but in the mean time don't fret too much if it is.
My partner (jokingly) refers to themselves as a "recovering alpha male" because their testosterone levels were also super high
T aromatises to E so if you have high T you probably have high E also.
Coincidence? 🧐
There's antagonism though unless levels are bonkers high (e.g. people on gear for ages).
No such luck for me!