Lesbians

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“That’s what I thought until I met my boyfriend!” (lemmy.blahaj.zone)

submitted 5 days ago* (last edited 5 days ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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(posting to here bc it’s my actual lesbian community)

Okay, that’s good for you that you thought you only liked women until you met your boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean that some man is gonna magically make me like men more.

I’m probably a biromantic lesbian because there are men I would still date, and they’re sorta like exceptions for me.

Whenever the topic comes up/I mention it for whatever reason, maybe for advice, whatever, I tell my friend (gf's friend, acquaintance i just met, or not a close friend who i talk to a lot), and they say something like “Oh, I used to think I only liked girls too until I met my handsome boyfriend ❤️”

And: “Maybe one day a man will change your life and point of view just like a man changed mine <33”

I’m happy for you and your BF, and I’m glad that you figured out you liked men too. I’m happy it worked for you, but like I said, some people aren’t attracted to men. A man isn’t going to “fix them” or “change their life”.

I don’t need a man to make me realize that I really like guys all along or anything. I get that some people are just trying to relate to the situation and that’s fine, but I’ve gotten this response a lot and needed to rant a little.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 days ago (1 children)

yeah, it's telling that the logic is always that the gay person will become (more) straight, but they don't really want to consider the reverse (that a straight person could "become" gay by their logic). It's a clear example of "heteronormativity" - the assumption that heterosexuality is conventional, normal, good, desirable, etc. and same-sex attraction is unnatural, abnormal, subversive, or otherwise bad.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

they might say something like "that's what my brother said until he met his gf"

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago

and the worst part is that a gay person implying the reverse "oh, you think you're straight? well that's what my brother said until he met his boyfriend" doesn't have the effect, because people genuinely believe gayness is illegitimate, a fad, etc. and straightness is the default that we eventually will return to when we wake up and realize we were fooling ourselves or something

it makes sense for a society that values heterosexuality, and that stigmatizes homosexuality