this post was submitted on 20 Dec 2024
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It's not misogynistic to admit you have trouble communicating with women.
true, just be gay instead.
Do you think that's what's happening (both in my example but also the OP greentext)? That they're admitting they have trouble communicating?
I could see a literal interpretation of "I don't understand women" as a standalone sentence being reasonably interpreted that way, sure. But given the context, I think that's really unlikely.
I think they're expressing frustration about not being able to communicate with women, and I think it's easy to misinterpret that frustration as aggression or misogyny.
To be fair, I don't mean like, raging, beating your wife misogyny. Just the standard kind that results in overgeneralizing and venting in this particular way.
The behavior described seems like either (1) the wife has big attachment and insecurity issues (maybe a personality or mood disorder) or (2) the anon has major, major communication issues (essentially driving the wife to desperate measures she might not have gone to otherwise). In either case, these are extremes. And extremes really shouldn't be generalized to the whole gender population, y'know? I can't think of anything BUT some amount of misogyny that would lead to that type of generalization.
A lot of men genuinely have trouble communicating with all women (beyond superficial day-to-day interactions). I don't think that's misogynistic, I think it's a symptom of a bigger problem in society. Boys aren't taught how to interact with women, and when they fall back to what they were taught about interacting with other men they quickly get themselves in trouble.
I don't really disagree with your overall point, I just think that's being way over generous to the anon here.
Like, do you think talking to your wife like she was a dude is really the only thing at play here?
No. Since you asked, I think the communication issues are most likely caused by both people involved, not just the man. I think the wife (in the OP) was expressing her own frustration when she suggested divorce, then felt like she had to follow through with it when OOP didn't react the way she wanted/expected him to. It sounds like neither person in that relationship is communicating effectively.
Yeah, I agree with that 100%.