this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2024
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Ah yes.
Also: instead of googling for the opening times better waste everyone's time by sending a text or an email to the shop and making them spell it out for you!
Also: if you see the shop is clearly closed, lights aren't on and you can see the opening times on the door and they say it's not open but someone is inside better start knocking because surely they wish to serve you.
Also: never read the instructions of a product. Instead complain that it's broken and demand a new product. Repeat.
Also: if you see a price list/menu/price tag or similar and you accidentally read it, better double check the price by asking "does this item cost what it says here"
Also: "employees only" actually means "for adventurous customers"
Also: if it says push, pull, if it says pull, push.
That’s because the shops know that no-one reads the website and doesn’t bother to update the opening hours when they change.
When I worked retail, people would always call asking about hours, especially around holidays. I started answering the phone "[Name of Store], we're open until 9."
The amount of people that didn't process this because they were too focused on what they were about to ask was amazing. The best were the people that realized right after they asked , and you could hear the hamster fall of the wheel.
Not only do people not read, they don't listen either.
Wrong. They don’t listen in the specific circumstance you expected them to listen. The beginning of a conversation isn’t meant to carry information. It only sets up the communication channel. The thing people are “listening” to are: Is the other person loud enough? Are they speaking my language? Do they have an accent that requires special attention from me to understand?
When people call a store, they expect the first few seconds of dialogue to be a greeting, which can be ignored; the name of the store, which they know; some phrase to indicate politeness, which they don’t care about; and then either silence or some other indication that the other end is now ready to process their request.
These expectations have been hammered into their brains for years by every store they have ever called. You are the odd one out. By trying to be extra helpful and give them what they want, you throw them off. Of course they need to recover, because the plan they had for how the conversation was to be going needs readjustment.
This also assumes that the callers had a chance to understand what you were saying in the first seconds. The first syllable or so of a conversation might be cut off because the line isn’t established quickly enough (which throws off the processing of the rest of the sentence). Their phones might not be set loud enough for the volume you’re transmitting. You might have fallen victim to the disease every person who regularly says the same things on the phone suffers from: You rattle off your script so quickly (and mumblingly) that the other person doesn’t understand.
All this is based on my experience and theory on how communication works. Don’t take it for granted. I’m no expert.