me_irl

But I went to several psychologists; tried various anti-depresssnts and mood stabilizers but none of them do anything for me.

Just want to point out that the efficacy of treatments isn't an indication of whether you actually have depression or not. Took me many years to find a working combination of meds and therapy, and it's still a struggle.

You mention your friends moving away, this could be loneliness/isolation. Made me think of this article: Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out

If I were to play "internet therapist" here (which is totally always a great idea) I would suggest to try spontaneity. Shake things up, go outside your not-so-comfort-zone, because it sounds to me like what you've been doing isn't working. And logic dictates the only way to find something that does work is by trying something different.