Melbourne

It’s true that some people have an easier path. It starts right at birth, eg born to good family, no serious health issues, no disabilities, born into a safe neighbourhood, opportunities at a good school, etc. Or unlucky to get all the opposites. And then stuff happens in life, a lot of which we can’t control. The good and bad stuff is not evenly distributed. Some people get lots of good, some lots of bad, most of us get some of each. All you can do is make the best of the cards you’re dealt. That’s it. It’s normal to be more cautious and pessimistic if you’ve had a lot of bad stuff happen. The trick is to find ways to move forward, and say to yourself each day is a new day.

Per Buddhism, Sickness, ageing and death are universal sufferings, everyone experiences them. The First Noble Truth is that All life is suffering. There's no escaping it. Sure some people have what appear to be easier lives, but everyone is suffering. The theory is that we get to choose how affected by that suffering we are.

I sure don’t.

It depends what you choose to focus on.

If I let what I've experienced be my focus I would dig a hole and lay down in it.

From my perspective, I do my best to never let any of the negative stuff I've experienced stop me from living the life I want.

I fail often. But I never give up. We may not be able to change the things that make our lives harder, but we can still live our lives on our own terms.

Edit: We can't let our pain define us.

No. Or rather, not all the time. I've had some baaad shit when I was younger which was largely of my own making, but have come now to a safe haven. Which I will defend with my life. I intend to live long enough to be a nuisance to my younger relatives. It will be good for their souls if they have any such thing. This should not be difficult I think.

even people who live a financially secure life can have bad things happen. Illness, accident, bereavement, interactions with bad people, victims of crime, natural disaster could happen, war

Like Pilk said, the middle path is best. It can be a struggle tho to remember that bad times are usually short lived,

But more than that ...

I've read whole books on this, philosophy and psychiatry books. People who live best are those who have stable healthy relationships with friends and family . This helps them cope with adversity and brings extra joy in good times.

I was in Footscray a while back and my husband said "we'll cross here" and I said "no we won't" and we kept walking. He understood I saw something he didn't. So if you're talking about personal safety yeah some people walk through life unfazed and for some of us (most women) have our eyes and ears open at all times whilst outside.

You come across as a naturally pessimistic/depressive person. There is absolutely a middle ground between that and delusional optimism.