this post was submitted on 17 Aug 2024
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White or brown toast?

Toasted or not?

Anything else I should know about cucumber sandwiches?

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (3 children)

Here's how you make a cucumber sandwich. Get a French baguette, cut it in half like a hoagie, finely dice cucumber and mix it with shredded carrots and diced jalapeno before quick pickling with cilantro, salt, pepper, garlic and lime juice. Let those sit for like 10 minutes. Take some chicken and marinate it with soy sauce, garlic, ginger, etc. Broil that shit, shred it up, stuff into sandwich and top with pickled veg

Finish by cutting some mayonnaise with sriracha and a bit of lime juice until it's drizzling consistency (salt and pepper to taste), and drizzle over the top of sandwich, top with more cilantro

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago (2 children)

If you went into an English tea room for afternoon tea and they served you that monstrosity and claimed it was a cucumber sandwich, you'd be perfectly within your rights to burn the entire place to the ground and not a single judge in the country would convict you.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Wishing to burn down the buildings of people that have too much flavor in their food is definitely on brand for a gammon. Been burning any buildings down lately under pretense of scary foreign invaders? Last week, maybe?

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

If I made some idiot a bahn mi and they cried about it then they can kindly fuck themselves and not eat it

that monstrosity

Most British response ever to a description of a bahn mi. Oh no, ethnic cuisine!!!

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago (2 children)

If the thread had been titled "how do I make a bahn mi" then I'd have upvoted you to the moon. But it wasn't. It was asking how to make that most English (not British, but English) of foods, a cucumber sandwich. And in case that wasn't a clue enough, the community is Ask UK. Not Ask Vietnam or Ask America.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago

Cucumbers aren't native to England. They're not even native to Europe.

The English, get this, incorporated the exciting new vegetable into their diet after being introduced by Indians, and ignored whiny people telling the world "cucumbers aren't English" until they died out and we're forgotten by history. Imagine the 17th century version of yourself saying they'll burn down any teahouse that sells the exotic Indian "cucumber" because it's not English?

You can't expand your culture if you never try to expand it and "burn down" any change.

Imagine the bellend in 1650 that went "oh tea? I don't touch that Chinese stuff, never tried it and never will, and I'll burn down any establishment that sells it"

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago

Yea i told you a better way, live with it

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That's a baguette - not a sandwich.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago

A baguette is bread, a sandwich is bread with stuff on it. Seeing as I described a baguette laden with filling, I'm pretty sure I described a sandwich, hoss

Can you guys just ban me from this "feddit" shithole, yall are terminally obtuse and unfunny

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago (1 children)

That's a bit like saying: you make a cucumber sandwich by crisping up some duck, steam some pancakes, put some duck on a pancake, then cut up cucumber and spring onions to sprinkle on the duck before using hoisin sauce as the paste to stick your rolled up pancakes together.