Science

I feel like the conversation is getting pretty far out of my depth, so again if I say something hurtful please let me know. If it helps, I've been diagnosed with a mild to moderate anxiety disorder, but I'm pretty functional and CBT has been enough for me to get through most of my rough patches. I also have a loved one who suffers from OCD (actual OCD, not the kind where you like things to be neat). I also know how unbelievably frustrating and hurtful it is to be told that you should just "think better" or somehow fix your own "bad thoughts" or "wrong feelings", so if I somehow unintentionally communicated that in my earlier comment I apologize, it's not what I intended.

My conception of mental illness has usually been that the problem is happening before volition really comes into the picture. So in your example of the videogame, it's not necessarily that there's a bug with the controller, but maybe there's a bug with the display. What you're seeing in the "game" isn't accurate in some way, so you wind up in the pit because you didn't see it, or because it seemed like it was somewhere else on the screen, or because something was indicating that the pit was the correct direction to go. The way I've always pictured mental illness is that the inputs on your controller might make perfect sense to another person if they could see what's on your display, but because the display is bugged they lead to the "wrong" outcome. To exit the metaphor a little, I might be feeling intense anxiety about something (or nothing in particular, thanks brain) and avoid it, because anxiety is our brain's signal that something is dangerous and should be avoided. But when that thing is an assignment for school, there's a problem with the input or the perception of that thing. Now, my brain causing me to feel amounts of anxiety that are wildly disproportionate with the thing itself is not really something I can control, but once I understand that my "display" is fucked up in a certain way, I can work around it to a certain degree and remain pretty functional.

I tend to believe that if we were able to get inside people's minds and understand all of the "inputs" they're getting, from their emotions, stray thoughts, traumas, memories, etc that for the vast majority of people, we'd be able to understand why they've made the choices that they make and they would make sense, in light of the information their brain is giving them. That's why the assertion that mass shooters don't have any mental illness is surprising to me. I can't understand why someone would make that choice if their display hasn't gotten fucked up in some major way. Now, maybe it is, but it's entirely environmental or social, or something along those lines. If that's true, then I guess I could make some sense of it, although it's hard for me to understand what experiences would lead to this kind of destructive decision.

Anyway, at this point I'm basically rambling about a bunch of stuff that I really have no expertise or deep understanding of, so I apologize for that, and I apologize again if I've said anything out of line.