this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2024
63 points (94.4% liked)
Asklemmy
43906 readers
1062 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
Search asklemmy ๐
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Don't know how old you are but I have had to several times and can't think what to say. You just put it behind you and move on. Be proud you stepped up and took your shot and accept the reality that it did not work out. If your a male this is just a fact of life in general. I will tell you that you did the right thing though. I have had friends who would position themselves in the friend zone for years with the thought they would just get to know them and realize how perfect they were or something. Its an aweful situation and I am glad I was able to avoid it as it was common in my peronality type of guy. You may not be a guy but I can really only give a guys perspective.
??? This isn't a gender thing?
males of my age generally had to make the move. its possibly different now. I can count on one hand the girls I knew from college and before who asked a guy out first.
Same in France among students. Males are expected to make the move
I feel like even within the straight paradigm women do a lot to express interest and can still feel "shot down" when those signals aren't reciprocated, outside of also asking guys out
oh yeah. Flirting is totally different. I would say growing up girls flirted more than guys.
My realization, now, was that they did. I was too clueless on picking up cues to realize it.