this post was submitted on 02 Aug 2024
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tl:dr; India is a terrible place to live in, Indians lead miserable lives and are not even aware of it, they are facing many other problems and they are not aware of that too, they are delusional and still stuck in the past. Being born poor in India signs you up for difficult to conquer problems because of the culture you grow up in, Human development happens at the pace of a tortoise here, India is a curse, now how can I get rid of the curse and lead a fulfilling and happy life?

I see the middle class Indians and while their life is better than mine, it's nothing to write home about. They are doing ok, they are not great and I am lower middle class, even if I try my best, I don't think I will be rewarded well for that. Indians start life at 0 while other developed countries are at an average of 4, Indians just dream of the 4, they just want that 4! That's their life, they pursue their life, whole lives, just to get a decent life! I don't want to do this, this doesn't excite me! Help! What can I do? P.S: I am a 22yo who is worthless and who has a worthless (0 value) degree from a useless Indian university, how can I improve my life!


If you want to read why I think being born in India is a multi-generational curse, carry on reading, otherwise, this was enough!

  1. Indian educational system is garbage and it doesn't create high-value labor, it produces unremarkable individuals.
  2. Indian infrastructure is a joke with everything built by the government being of the lowest quality.
  3. Indian is one of most corrupt countries in the world (top 10-20 maybe).
  4. People are extremely tribal and in the absence of resources for development, Indians will try to barter what little resources there are along community lines (reservations) than force the government to try and create more economic opportunities.
  5. Private Industry from foreign companies are a sigh of relief but due to above mentioned reasons (low-skilled labor, bad economy, bad infrastructure, stupid policies and Kafkaesque bureaucracy) most companies justifiably don't want to set up shop in India and this exacerbates the economy problem.
  6. Indians clamor for Western attention and approval, most of them do realize India is nothing to write home about but they don't understand the extent of the problem. They are way too proud of minuscule achievements. They are even less aware of how the culture that prevails now will produce nothing but failure. They lose it when anyone of Indian decent does anything noteworthy and they are way too proud to accept the problem. This is the reason why youtubers love to praise India, they know what works in India. The government takes advantage of this and calls everyone who dares to criticize the country or their government as anti-national. Many journalists have been jailed for reporting facts. We never learn and we are committed to never learning! Even when Indians leave India, they try to create a mini-India abroad and not go out of their cultural comfort zone.
  7. We are creepy! I was creepy, I am a little creepy still, I had to work A LOT to be able to be normal around women, that trope, it's real and it's just saddening in the highest degree. Indians don't socialize with opposite sex a lot and it's discouraged and sometimes forbidden in this culture to do so, so you create adults who can't really talk comfortably towards women. Took me a long time to realize the problem and solve it, the past me disgusts the present me!

Edit: 8. Indians lack any kind of civic responsibility. They throw garbage everywhere, they spit pan (tobacco stuff) anywhere and everywhere, open defecation isn't as big of a problem as people pissing in the streets but it still remains a problem, I have done this too (When I was little). I can't get my parents to not throw off plastic off the train no matter how much I explain then why it's wrong in multiple ways! Most Indian cities look like a garbage dumb than a place to live. If people at least had kept our streets clean and acknowledge the problems facing this country instead of being proud of mediocrity, I would have been been more than willing to try to turn things for the better here, but they don't!!

I can write a book about this, but for the sake of your time and mine, I will stop.

I have realized one thing after being born here, it's irredeemable! It won't get drastically better. I just don't know what to do about it and that is why I am asking you for advice!

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

My Indian friends tell me that Indian people are the most racist people in the world, to other Indians. That's the biggest problem and why they left. You're clearly a part of that. A traditional caste system and the usual socioeconomical issues of a large population obviously won't help. These seem to be the cores of your issues. It's not your fault, but you shouldn't participate in that bullshit by saying such things and having such a defeated mindset.

You need to travel. You need to leave.

After you travel, you can self-assess under a more experienced and open perspective. You will likely not want to return, but you will not be hitting the world so jaded and focused on competitive success within society. You will relax, you will get options, you will settle into a comfortable life and in a few years you will complain about the mediocrity of being middle-class instead.

"But I can't travel."

Yes you can. You have plenty of skillsets that will earn you more money per hour elsewhere. All the while building up friendships, networks, and experiences. Your only issue is visas which you co-ordinate as you go. For now, much of the western world is very open to Asian immigrants and you'd be foolish to not jump on it while it's still an option. Target the richer nations with low unemployment rates and you'll find secure work.

Your main issue will be later when domestic family want part of what you've gained. That's up to you. I have a friend that I found out was giving more than half his income back home because $60K AUD seems huge to people not paying $550 a week in rent. And I've also got a friend that, after her father died, threw her middle fingers to family and India vowing to never return.

Your situation is harder to endure than just leaving. But the amount of blame and hate you put on your circumstances makes me wonder if you can even realise that.

But as a white guy with 13 friends from Nepal, India, and Bangladesh, I'd like to think my advice isn't entirely disregardable, as it's indirectly from them.

Edit: Ah shit, I forgot that apart from visas your only other issue will be racism. It really depends on the industry and nation, but obviously there will be those anti-immigration even though they don't realise immigration Is saving their fucking livelihood. Plus, if you talk about India and Indians the way you did In your post, you'll fit right in with them lol—thats not a good thing long-term, but I guess an odd uptick (???)

Point is, whoever you are, you were born and will die. Go find a place in the world that you're not miserable in. That's your current meaning in life.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That’s the biggest problem and why they left. You’re clearly a part of that.

Sorry, I am not racist. I know all this way too well. i.e., The corrupt bureaucrat and the politician who created this system knew all too well what he was doing and he had good personal motivations for it. I myself have put myself in their shoes and their world, and have tried to see what's working in their mind. I won't say I am racist, if I am racist I am towards the culture which created this shitshow. But you have good reasons to think that given my post. I am not blaming any ethnically or linguistically different group for where we are, I am blaming the culture. Babies are not born creepy, the culture makes them what they become. The creepy guys I talk about, I am pretty sure they won't have been creepy in a better culture.

not your fault, but you shouldn’t participate in that bullshit by saying such things and having such a defeated mindset.

Trust me, I once had hope, but this system beats it out of you! This system has failed me multiple times in dire ways. That being said, you are 100% correct, defeatism and resentment, nothing good comes out of them. I am no longer resentful as much as I used to be, I will try to keep that defeatism at bay!

But as a white guy with 13 friends from Nepal, India, and Bangladesh, I’d like to think my advice isn’t entirely disregardable, as it’s indirectly from them.

Trust me, I read it very intently. I will try to follow what you have suggested, I have a few friends abroad (White Native borns), they know and understand me, they will help me get out! :)

, if you talk about India and Indians the way you did In your post, you’ll fit right in with them lol

I don't blame them tbch, but yeah, I plan on mixing with the non-racist bunch and spending my spare hours in the library if I ever get there! Kudos!

I appreciate the effort and the intention behind your reply, thank you very much for trying to help me!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Sorry. It's easy for me to say, "Be more positive!" when my feet have never been in your shoes. Sorry if it seemed patronising in any way—its good advice, I'm just bad with choice of words a lot of the time. You seemed to understand my point, though. Perhaps a good (paraphrased) analogy is one I learned in Uganda; don't use the poisoned well lest it poisons you, lest you poison those that don't use the well.

And I'd like to remind you that you can do, literally, whatever you want at any time. The only considerations are consequences. You can literally murder the next person you see, in the same way you can just walk off and start your journey. One has consequences of prison lol, but the other... well, who knows?

This mindset has saved my life in hard times. Where everything felt awful. Walking away from it seemed so much more obvious than staying. What's the worst that could happen? I'm happier? Haha. Yep. Time to just start walking. No plan, no direction, just knowing "I can not do this any more and I won't be here any more."

You'll be surprised how rapidly thing start becoming good when you leave the bad. Don't doubt yourself. Don't be in a rut. You'll never live otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 months ago

You seemed to understand my point, though

Very well, you considered a lot of things before you wrote that comment :).

Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t be in a rut. You’ll never live otherwise.

Yes sir! I need to deal with that.

Again, thanks for the well-intentioned comments! :)