Relationship Advice
Welcome to the Relationship Advice community on Lemmy and Kbin!
The ideal place to ask for help with your relationships: romantic, friendships, we don't know what we are yet, co-workers or just human interactions in general.
Please make sure you read our rules before posting.
Rules:
Rules can be clicked on to be expanded.
1: Treat all users with respect. [!]
The goal of this community is helping OP and readers, not making fun of them. We are an inclusive community, any sort of disrespect towards ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, etc, will not be tolerated.
2: Mark sexual content as NSFW. [!]
Posts containing mentions or descriptions of sexual topics must be tagged as NSFW. This includes descriptions of sexual acts, requests for advice in the bedroom, explicit descriptions of your body and similar content.
3: All posts must be a request for advice.
All posts must be phrased as a request for advice or as a question. Sharing of stories, personal anecdotes, or past mistakes are only allowed if they're followed by a clear and relevant request for advice with the situation.
4: Provide sufficient and relevant information.
Your title and body need to contain enough information relevant to your situation, such as ages, genders, and the relationship between people mentioned. For privacy-related concerns, we recommend using fake names and broad general locations.
5: Comments must be on topic and relevant to OP.
Comments must be directly related to helping OP, asking for more information, providing relevant resources or otherwise relevant to the thread. Off-topic comments and remarks, suspicious attempts at gathering personal data from OP or other readers, or bullying will not be tolerated.
6: This is a community for requesting advice, not moral judgement.
Moral judgements, "AITA?" and other similar questions are better served by different communities.
Reddit reposts are allowed.
As a temporary measure and the result of a poll, Reddit reposts are allowed following an expanded set of rules: https://lemmy.world/post/317115
How are rules enforced and bans applied?
For the most part, this community operates under the assumption that users are acting in good faith and should be given second-chances for their mistakes. Posts and comments with very light rule violations, or otherwise undesired but mostly harmless content, can be removed by a moderator on a case by case basis without any further punitive actions.
For violations of our rules, we follow a “3 strike” system as follows:
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1st violation: 72 hours ban + moderator warning via PMs.
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2nd violation: 1 week ~ 1 month ban + final warning via PMs.
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3rd violation: 1 month ~ permanent ban.
The goal of this system is making sure users are made aware of their behavior before being permanently banned, but also protecting the community from any rule violations.
Exceptions:
While the “3 strike” system will be applied to the majority of situations, rules marked with a [!] in the sidebar signifies a rule that, if violated in an intentional, malicious or significant way, can warrant an immediate permanent ban regardless of the number of previous violations. This includes severe disrespect to users or groups, dangerous content, and similar.
Related communities:
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Adulting: [email protected]
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No Stupid Questions: [email protected]
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Mental Health [email protected]
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He's gay and closeted, looking for a friend, and it's easier to talk to a girl than directly to you.
He has feelings for your girlfriend. This is not an issue, as long as you trust your girlfriend. Feel flattered that your girlfriend is so awesome.
It’s really impossible to know without more context, but some people just find it easier to talk to women. Even if he doesn’t have feelings for your girlfriend, he might simply find her interactions easier to process. This isn’t uncommon with people who are going through a lot of heavy personal trauma.
Clearly girlfriend is not having it anymore... He needs to find another shop.
These behavior already crossed inappropriate line and likely this person has no social skills to navigate that.
Also, this person is not OPs friend
I don’t think anything here is clear. It’s virtually impossible to understand a real world scenario from a couple of paragraphs written by a single person. Interpersonal relationships have a shit ton of nuance, and making judgements quickly often burns bridges that had no business being burned.
And that itself is very sparse on details. It didn’t say what his response was at all, which could turn the situation any number of ways.
He said everything was fine and jokingly downplayed it.
I do trust my girlfriend 200%. But having feelings for her is one thing, another is acting on them. I don't think I can be his friend if that's the case...
He's texting her back and ignoring you, he's already made the decision that you're not his friend, catch up.
It's not that he's just texting her back. He's initiating chats with her and being insistent. My girlfriend is a bit naive and even she found it umcomfortable. She described the chats and, while I didn't tell her so I wouldn't upset her, it was clearly an awkward attempt to flirt.
I'm just old enough to fully understand this stuff now... being old is no fun, but at least I can see though bad attempts at flirting