Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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You could try Tailscale? It creates a secure tunnel to your server so you don't have to connect it to the internet. Not sure if that checks all your boxes though.
But I need to configure something on the client side... I want people to access my server as they access their Instagram account
Then you can't "hide" your server IP without a VPS/VPN set up. Maybe I'm not understanding what you're asking? Your public IP is visible to any machine you connect to and that includes Cloudflare's servers.
Are you worried about copyright or something? This isn't legal advice, but I doubt they give a shit unless you're hosting content illegally for a large number of people. Obviously, only take the risk if you are comfortable with the potential consequences where you live.
I was looking into Tailscale, but it got me a little worried. I'm not very knowledgeable, so I hope someone can correct me
They don't allow ssh, so you have to give your keys over them and they manage your ssh connection? That seems idiotic. Surely that can't be correct?
I'm my use case, I was wanting to rsync to an off-site Synology from a Linux box. Synology also doesn't allow ssh over their VPN service - frustrating.
You can always use something like SSHwifty It retains your logins through your browser's session data and never on your server, but it will allow you to remote into your local system from anywhere on the WWW if you desire to do so. With Tailscale, once you are connected into your Tailnet, you can pretty much SSH into any of your devices as long as the subnet sharing flag is turned on I believe. I've never had any issues with mine not allowing any SSH connections.
Pretty much the only thing I use Tailscale for is remotely SSHing from my phone to my home NAS, and they definitely don’t manage my keys. They do have a “Tailscale SSH” feature I don’t use…
I'm not really knowledgeable about it, but there is an article from Tailscale that explains how they use SSH (basically it creates a separate SSH server specifically for Tailnet traffic). From what I understand, this feature is relatively new.
You may also want to look into Tailnet lock.