Comradeship // Freechat

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I don't know what to do. (lemmygrad.ml)

submitted 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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A few days ago i made a post about me starting working at a factory, grad has been very kind in providing messages of support and tips on how to deal with physical exhaustion and keeping healthy.

today, i don't know what to do or to think, im one week in and seriously thinking in quitting, can't take anymore, not so much about physical exhaustion, but mentally, even cried in the bathroom today.

and that is what is bothering me, how to come to terms with being so weak. im not trying to make anyone fell pity or something, especially when we still have colonies where things are hardcore and palestinians getting massacred.

like, idk what to do, i can't do mental work because i can't get a fucking job in it, and I'm not handling physical work, and confused about how being weak and not even capable of taking care of myself and handle a job, and be useful in a revolution or be up to the same level of many brave people fighting for the rights to exist, or something as simple as following party discipline.

sometimes i which i could just cease to exist, that way would stop being dead weight and not smudge the good name of our comrades.

edit: i am really moved by your kindness, i will answer each soon.

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[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 months ago

You're not weak for finding out what your limitations are, comrade. Everyone is different and have their own tolerances and limitations. Being vulnerable to yourself and acknowledging that is not weakness. And while yes, the Palestinians have it way rougher right now, having to do anything they can to survive an ongoing genocide, that does not mean your own difficulties and limitations are not important too, you probably live worlds apart from them and your life is also going on.

I think the best course of action would be to try to hold on a little longer there and at the same time try to contact a mental health professional. That way you could still try to be in your current job a little longer to see how things go while also seeking the help you need right now.

And like another comrade already told you, if the place is so toxic and you're the only counter to that, your presence there matters a lot. You don't need to be confrontational of them, as that can create animosity between you and the other workers, but being able to listen, assert your position and stand your ground when needed, could be the change they need to be able to pierce the veil of ideology they are clearly immersed in.