this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2024
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Autism

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Just looking for resources (lemmy.world)
submitted 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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Hi, I have been a lurker for a while here. I have never gotten well with people. Most of the time I overstep our boundaries or the person I am getting along with just ends up taking advantage of me. This has been a problem running in my family for atleast 3 generations and now, quite frankly, I am tired of it.

My issue is that differentiating between healthy and unhealthy relationships is just too hard and using "rules" to figure it out is just too ambiguious. For example, joking about a person can be either a bonding experience in friendship or just plain bullying. Telling where the line switches between the two is a bit too hard.

So, what I am saying is, can someone please give me some resources for how to interact with people. Not just pamphlets or articles but rather full on courses on how to talk, how to handle/read body language, what people mean by what they say, how to recognize when someone is taking advantage of you. Things that go in depth about this sort of stuff.

Everything related to relationships, society and speech. This can be courses, books, reasearch papers, someone's hobby project, wiki, etc. Articles that go in depth about it are fine as well. Thanks in advance.

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[โ€“] [email protected] 0 points 5 months ago (1 children)

words x 0 + facial expression + action x 3

Wouldn't "words x 0" result in 0 every single time? That would make the formula "facial expressions + action x 3".

Also, can you elaborate on how to use this formula and provide an example? It seems really interesting to me. I actually have a protocol that I use to assess other people's intentions, disposition, and engagement the relationship with me.

[โ€“] [email protected] 0 points 5 months ago

Yes, you're correct on the formula calculation. I keep "words x 0" to show that the variable has been accounted for. Sorta like significant digits.

The formula was developed because I regularly found myself in disadvantages relationships. I dont expect many if anybody will be able to relate much past this point...

I don't blame anyone but myself nor am I mad with any of these individuals as I'm simply mentally malformed (context below). This formula gave me the ability to determine when a relationship wasn't worth maintaining.

Mentally malformed context: I would take someone's statement as truth over my own observed reality. Example, Person: You promised me you'd do X Me: I have no memory of that. Person: Well you did. Me: I'm sorry I didn't get that done, what can I do to make it up to you. Person: X still has to get done, and you can do Y to make it up to me. Me: okay. Me to myself: I must be constantly missing time. I must be going crazy... Try to act normal so you don't get locked up.

Having access to a absolute (though arbitrary) number has given me the ability to make better decisions.

Also, I would be interested if you elaborated on the social protocol you mentioned.