Holy Shit Dude.
When extermination methods were tested to relieve the Einsatzgruppen which had up to that point in the war been shooting people close up, by hand, gas vans were used. As tests. Until Zyklon B was introduced.
I don't know what you're on, but it is a historic fact that before the gas chambers were used, gas vans were a method of murder.
Take a hard Look at your partner, this is the best you'll ever get. Dont fuck it up. Listen to them and go to fucking therapy.