this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
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Microblog Memes

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[–] [email protected] 73 points 1 week ago (6 children)

A treasury bond delivering 8% is probably one from a dangerous country to invest in.

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[–] [email protected] 146 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I just walk to the 7/11 and buy a scratcher. I never win anything but I could make at least $100,000 in just one day!

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I never understood the appeal of scratch offs, 100k? If you gotta dream, dream big, play the lottery

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

The keno addicts at the bar i work at are wild. They just keep silently putting in money and watching the drawings. I prefer that to the ones who try to explain their strategies to me or complain that some number appears in every drawing. Or the guy who came in Wednesday night and kept betting $10 that the first pitch of every at bat of the Mets/Brewers game was gonna be a strike. It's bleak.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 week ago

“No, you don’t understand! I have an angle!”

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I remember hearing a story like twenty years ago about a person that figured out that serial number were disclosing payouts. They would buy a bunch, find the winners, scratch them, then return the losers for their money back. I think I heard about it on a planet money or this American life ages and ages ago.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Who in their right mind is accepting returns of lottery tickets, scratched or not????

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Store clerks who just want to get through their shift without committing battery upon their customers and are definitely not paid enough to deal with that shit.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Not paid enough to say "no refunds" but given the ability to authorize giving out money for unofficial reasons? If it's unauthorized, then they're essentially stealing cash and assuming an extremely high risk of getting fired to avoid confrontation.

I've never worked a gas station, but I've worked fast food and I would have been fired soooo fast if I were giving out unauthorized refunds. Maybe even prosecuted if the amount was large enough. I've seen people fired for less.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 week ago

Instant gratification is a hellava drug

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[–] [email protected] 144 points 1 week ago (7 children)

I know you're joking, but I used to work at a convenience store and the scratcher addicts were the most depressing part. I guess I should be grateful that the store I worked at wasn't in an area where more depressing kinds of addicts would be around.

[–] [email protected] 77 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I remember one day walking into a 7/11, in maybe 2002, and there were 2 guys in suits, totally dishevelled, collars undone, looking like they've been awake for 3 days, depression coating their faces, and they had a stack of scratch tickets that they were silently just scratching off.

The story I have in my head is that their business fell apart and this was some past ditch desperate attempt to save it with the little money they had left. I have no idea what actually happened but here we are 20+ years later and I still think about them occasionally.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago

The guy who started FedEx literally put his company's payroll on a roulette table just to make enough to stay in business.

[–] [email protected] 80 points 1 week ago (4 children)

The one thing that going to a real casino taught me is that, despite what Hollywood would have us believe, casinos are not full of impeccably dressed classy people, but very old retirees that look like they only have a few years left to live, and disheveled men who look less well dressed than me in my PJs at home, who are gambling away large sums of money in a fit of anxiety and addiction.

Really depressing crap.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 week ago (11 children)

And yet Donald Trump still managed to lose money somehow, which should have really told us something about his supposed "business accumen".

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago

Oh for real. Walking through a casino is like being immersed in despair and obsession. I find no enjoyment in it at all.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago

And smoke. Don't forget about the smoke

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I associate my time in Las Vegas mostly with elderly people with oxygen tanks, chain smoking while they put coin after coin in the slot machine. Just sad.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Now you just hook your debit card to the machine and you don't even have to put a coin in!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

And they took the pull handles away because they can siphon money out of retirement accounts much faster if the ~~victim~~ player only needs to press a button.

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I know of a few small stores that owe their livelihoods to the local gambling addicts and the lottery machine. The entire business if dedicated to a few whales since selling snacks and coffee to randos didn't work out and they would otherwise close. They even set up private rooms where they could sped the day scratching tickets as they would come in and blow and entire pay/welfare/retirement check.

The logic is always the same, "I'm up $500 today" not even calculating the losses and "I just need one big win". People will farm gamblers like cattle.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

That's really sad. It's the equivalent of putting lab rats in a cage with a cocaine/amphetamine button.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago

Perfectly legal since the state owned the equipment being used to ruin lives.

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[–] [email protected] 95 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Since when have treasury bonds gone above 6%?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 week ago (1 children)

It's like those educational explanations of compound interest I remember from childhood that tried to encourage you to save money. They would always start with 1 dollar and a savings account with 20% interest, and end up retiring as a millionaire.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I remember getting really frustrated as a young man when I decided to take that advice, and wasted hours looking for these mythical 18% return accounts.

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[–] [email protected] 78 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Oh, I get it now! 8%! How droll!

(What the fuck is he talking about?)

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Three million is the joke, 8% is the hint that it’s a joke. It’s the same sort of satire that Lemmy frequently reposts. “I became wealthy with hard work, determination, and a small loan of a million dollars.”

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Well, both of us are socialists (I can't comment on the other person). We think about money in such a different way that any money joke about investment is going to lose it's humor. I don't understand it as a joke either, but I definitely understood the financial advice. He selected some large, relatively uncontroversial companies that will pay you part of the quarterly profits based on the number of stocks you own. Tbh I'd avoid the day trading and choose high dividend ETFs instead. $100k is still very out of reach for most people, but it's a reasonable investing portfolio.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I get conflicting information about high dividend ETFs. Some people swear by them, others say they're terrible or at least should be avoided. I'm too ignorant to know why either way :/

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 week ago (1 children)

By the nature of ETFs, you're definitely going to make less income because your money gets put into an investment pool and returns are proportional. However it makes you less tied to the stock market, which is increasingly tied to a person's ability to retire

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