this post was submitted on 09 Sep 2024
111 points (93.0% liked)
The Onion
4490 readers
574 users here now
The Onion
A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.
Great Satire Writing:
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Look, man, I've been there. One moment you're having a regular day, you get that little craving, and bam, you're in a DQ, covered in blood, Blizzard in hand.
Covered in blizzard, blood in hand.
Sons of bitches had it coming after they killed Orange Julius
Do they still do the flips the blizzard upside down to show thickness when you are covered in blood?
Of course. They don't even charge you for it! Wonderful experience, I recommend doing everything covered in blood. Also a great conversation starter!
The real life hacks are always in the reply.